


Give Me Something to Hold Onto

by rosetintmyworld



Category: GOT7
Genre: Baby Boy BamBam, Daddy Jackson wang, Little Space, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Pet Names
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-22
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2020-12-28 16:41:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 22,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21139874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosetintmyworld/pseuds/rosetintmyworld
Summary: Bambam's been acting strange lately and Jackson wants to get to the bottom of it.He never thought he'd figure out Bambam's littlest secret.





	1. Discovery

Jackson sat on the couch, watching the two youngest members fight on the floor. He didn't know what had been going on between them lately, but it was getting on his last nerve.

They would fight over the smallest things, tugging controllers between them, pinching each other, picking on each other constantly, or whining about who had what first.

It was so immature. 

Bambam had been acting weird lately anyway. 

It’d started just recently when Bambam moved out. He didn't know what was going on with the younger member.

He would just go quiet and walk around like his brain was just gone. He would be backstage, and he’d just get quiet, staring past everyone, or he’d disappear whenever he could. That was slightly more typical of the younger because he and Yugyeom would get around, go off and do whatever it was they did when they were alone.

But now, he’d leave Yugyeom behind. 

He never left Yugyeom behind.

He was also doing things that weren’t normal to him, behaviourally. He'd started whispering to himself, and petting himself.

And crying. 

Bambam had never been one to cry. Yugyeom, he cried every time the wind shifted it seemed, but not Bambam. He only cried about three times since they'd met, and one of those times had been when Mark threw a laptop at him.

But now, Jackson would turn around and the boy would be crying. He tried to hide it sometimes. He’d just go away to do it, or just cry silent tears, but it was starting to happen a lot more frequently, and he’d always just walk away and hide from the group before anyone brought it up to his attention.

It wasn’t normal behavior for him, but it wasn’t always.

He wasn’t always spacy, or weepy.

Most times he was normal, loud, obnoxious, pain in Jackson’s ass Bambam, so he didn’t think anything  _ too  _ bad had happened to him. He didn’t think he’d been assaulted, or that he was depressed, or struggling with something like that, it was just often enough that it made him notice it. 

“Give it!” Bambam wailed, and Yugyeom tugged it away harder, nearly knocking Bambam over. Bambam’s face was turning red, his eyebrows dipped heavily in an almost childish pout as he tried to regain his balance and not give up the toy to the taller boy.

“I'm taking it! I'm tired of your bickering. Since you're going to act like a child, I'll treat you like one,” Jackson yelled, plucking the controller out of their hands. Yugyeom sucked his teeth and whined, which was par for the course for Yugyeom, Yugyeom was whiny, it was like his one character trait. He was expecting Bambam to mouth off, to say something snarky and outrageous, instead, he got something unexpected. Bambam froze, his eyes wide and watery like he was lost in his head again.

Jackson was too annoyed because of how long he’d had to endure it though and the thought that it would happen again in twenty minutes or so, so when he got no response, he grabbed the boy, dragging him to his room.

“What’s going on?” Jackson asked, sitting the boy on his bed and Bambam just shrugged.

He was still staring ahead, his face still lost and distant, and a shrug wasn’t sufficient, not even a little bit.

“Bam-ah, ” he warned, his voice low and authoritative and Bambam’s face crumpled, his hands coming up to run through his hair.

“Noo’s sorry,” he whimpered, his voice tiny and childlike. He broke out into sobs.

“What’s wrong?” Jackson whispered, sitting beside him on the bed and Bambam curled up on his lap, tucking his head into his chest.

“Pa,” he whimpered and Jackson ran his hands through his hair.

Jackson and Mark were adventurous in the bedroom, to say the least, and he can admit that they’d called each other daddy before, but the way Bambam whimpered it wasn't sensual or sexual, it was as if he were an actual child, in need of comfort from his father. Jackson was a lot of things, but he wasn’t cruel. He could see that Bambam needed him right now, so he did what he did best, he accommodated the younger male. He rubbed the boy’s back firmly, the circles helping to slow down his tears until he was no longer sobbing.

He was babbling to himself in a strange mix of Thai, English, and Hangul, his sentences hard to follow as he picked at the cotton of his shirt, his voice so soft that he couldn’t pick out the words that were coming out.

“What’s going on Bammie?” He asked once he had gotten quiet, whatever he said abandoned for the strings on the bottom of his shirt and Bambam looked at him, his eyes wide and wet, his eyelashes clinging to each other.

“Everything is too much and gyeomy won’t share, ” he pouted, his voice quiet and shaky. Jackson rocked him slightly, trying to figure out what the hell everything was, and exactly he could make sense of what was going on with him.

“Noo’s scared, ” he whispered, his voice cracking with the emotion and Jackson wiped the tears off of his face with the end of his t-shirt, before letting it drop back onto his stomach. He resituated the younger so his head was laid against his chest again, Bambam’s arms tucked into his chest with his fists balled up under his chin as his chest rose and fell quickly with a newer onslaught of tears no doubt.

“It's okay, Daddy’s here.”

Bambam, let out a deep breath before moving around some more, to get comfortable. Jackson could feel his breathing getting more level, his sobs turning into hiccups before he finally let out one last sigh, his eyes fluttering closed and his limbs loosening. He twitched a little, his thumb sliding up to his mouth until he fell into a deep sleep, his nose buried into Jackson’s shirt as if he were finally comfortable, finally safe. 

Jackson watched as the younger slept, wondering what he was going to do. Yugyeom had gone back to the dorm with Mark and Bambam had fallen into such a deep sleep that Jackson couldn’t bear to wake him. He had the feeling that the younger hadn’t been sleeping well since he moved out, and that this might be his deepest sleep since then.

He didn’t know what to do with the younger, didn’t know what had set him off, or even what he would say when he woke up. He didn’t understand what was going on with him, and he really wanted answers. 

He heard the boy shift in bed and he moved to sit on the bed beside him, before sliding to the floor to make more room for him. 

“Whats-” Bambam spoke, his voice groggy as he opened his eyes. He pulled his thumb out of his mouth, wiping it on his pants leg before wiping the corners of his mouth. Jackson could see the red staining his cheeks as he kept his eyes on the bedspread. 

He looked so nervous about what Jackson would think about him.

“Hey, are you awake?” Jackson asked gently and Bambam moved his head sharply once, the movement small.

“How are you feeling?” Jackson asked and he shrugged one shoulder.

“Where did Yugyeom go?” He asked.

“He went back to the dorm with Mark,” Jackson pointed out and Bambam kicked his legs over the side of the bed. 

“I should head home, that idiot was supposed to drive me,” Bambam complained and Jackson cleared his throat. 

“I can drive you. I’m supposed to pick Mark back up later anyway,” Jackson explained. 

Technically, he was supposed to go with Mark when he left for the dorm. Mark wanted to pick up some more clothes because he didn’t want to completely commit to living with Jackson, so he made sure to leave some of his stuff in the dorm so that he would have to come back. Jackson didn’t want to leave Bambam alone in his apartment though. Not because he thought that he would cause some damage or something, but because he was afraid that the boy would wake up alone, and there was so much that they had to talk about. 

“No, hyung you don’t have to do that,” Bambam started and Jackson shushed him. 

“I can’t have you walk home. Unless you want to stay here tonight?” Jackson asked and Bambam shook his head. 

“You said it yourself, Mark is coming back, I don’t want to interrupt the two of you, besides, I have to get back to my cats,” Bambam said and Jackson sighed, getting off of the floor. 

“Did you want to leave now? We could go get some dinner or something beforehand,” Jackson spoke gently and Bambam shook his head again. 

“No. I just want to go home,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded, watching as Bambam got off of the bed and headed towards the door. 

Jackson grabbed one of his jackets, slinging it over Bambam’s shoulder before leading him to his car.

“So,” Jackson said as he pulled in front of the apartment building. 

“This is my apartment,” Bambam said uselessly as if Jackson didn’t know where he lived.

“Yeah, I know,” Jackson said and Bambam drummed his hands on his thighs. 

“So I should get going,” Bambam said and Jackson grabbed his collar to keep him from opening the door. 

“Wait just a minute. I want to talk to you about earlier,” Jackson said and Bambam cleared his throat. 

“It was nothing, just a joke, or something, look, I’m tired hyung, I’ll talk to you later,” He explained, sounding absurd.

“You just slept for three hours. I’m not going to judge you, Bambam. You know that I love you. I’m worried about you. Tell me what’s going on,” Jackson said and Bambam rubbed his hands over his hair before dragging it down his face. 

“It’s so stupid honestly, I just-” He paused as if he were trying to get his thoughts together. 

“Sometimes- Sometimes I just get so stressed you know? I just- everything just seems too much and I just can’t- I can’t cope. So like my mind, it just- I can’t explain it, it’s like I’m too small to deal with all of my big problems, and my mind just- it numbs it I guess and I’m younger, I don’t know how to explain it. My problems are just too big,” Bambam spoke emphatically and Jackson nodded, not really sure exactly what he was talking about, but knowing that he understood. Being an idol was a lot, especially how young they were, and Bambam had been here since he was thirteen. They had so many things on their plate, and sometimes it was too much.

“Okay. It’s okay that you don’t know,” Jackson soothed and Bambam cleared his throat. 

“I just- can I just go upstairs?” He asked and Jackson nodded.

Bambam got out of the car, neglecting to say goodbye as he hunched his shoulders. 

He headed to the building and Jackson paused, watching him go before driving off. 

“Son-ah, what’s on your mind?” Mark asked as he stepped out of the shower, running a towel through his hair. 

“How do you cope with being an idol?” Jackson asked and Mark stopped, turning to look at him. 

“What do you mean?” He asked, frowning down at Jackson as he tried to decipher what he meant. 

“I just- it’s stressful, isn’t it? How do you cope? What do you do to keep sane?” He asked and Mark shrugged, coming to sit next to him. 

“Is everything okay? Are you feeling alright?” He asked, putting his hands on Jackson’s face to feel for a fever. 

“I’m okay, I’m not sick, I don’t feel tired or anything, I was just wondering,” Jackson asked, leaning into Mark’s arms. 

Mark was always worried about how he was feeling since Jackson was prone to sickness, and even more prone not to stop, even when he was sick. He wasn’t as bad as Jaebum, who had the policy of ignoring it until it got worse, but he also got more sick than Jaebum. 

“I don’t know- I rely on you guys, you know? When I feel like it’s too much, I think about the fact that you are there, that I have you guys, and I compartmentalize. I try not to give my whole self to the idol thing, there’s two different Marks, Idol Mark, and Real Mark,” Mark explained and Jackson nodded absently.

“I’m going to bed, are you coming?” Mark asked softer and Jackson nodded. 

Mark crawled into bed and Jackson followed, pulling his phone out as Mark turned on his side to fall asleep. 

He felt like he should have told Mark about what happened with Bambam, but he didn’t even understand it, and he wasn’t sure how to explain that one of their closest friends called him Daddy and then fell asleep in his lap. 

He didn’t think it would go over well. 

He watched Mark’s chest begin to rise and fall before opening his search engine. He looked at Mark once more before turning it on incognito mode. 

he typed furiously, trying to figure out what the hell it was that Bambam was going through before finding it on a strange forum sight. 


	2. Negotiation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jackson confronts Bambam and they negotiate what the space will entail.

Jackson knocked on Bambam’s door, rubbing his hands together. 

It was getting later in the year, Korean falls generally giving way to horrid winters. 

He finally put the code in, when he assumed that the boy wouldn’t come to the door. 

He walked into the apartment cautiously, stepping over another cat before finding Bambam in his bedroom. 

“Hyung,” Bambam said, standing up quickly. 

“I let myself in, I hope that’s okay,” He said and Bambam nodded. Jackson looked around. 

The apartment was impeccably clean, which he wasn’t surprised about, and there were random touches of Yugyeom if you looked hard enough, like a discarded cardigan in the corner, or a carelessly tossed book on the coffee table-- Yugyeom had fallen into reading lately. The apartment was chic, modern, and the epitome of Young and Rich. It seemed like an apartment that Kylie Jenner would have. But it was also impersonal, the only indicators of Bambam being the cat tree and abundance of cats. 

“I’m not interrupting, right?” Jackson asked and Bambam looked around at the empty space.

“Interrupting what?” He asked incredulously as if he really had no idea what Jackson could be talking about. 

Jackson just shook his head, sitting down and gesturing for Bambam to do the same. 

“I figured it out,” Jackson offered and Bambam frowned. 

“Figured out that I’m not doing anything?” Bambam asked, trying to sound put out at his presence but Jackson pushed through. 

“I figured out what’s going on with you,” Jackson said and Bambam stared at him blankly. 

“Do you feel overwhelmed a lot, everything’s too hard?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded softly. 

“Do you feel too young to deal with things, like, you feel like things are just over your head?” Bambam nodded again.

“Do you want someone to take care of you, and feel emotionally sensitive? Like you need hugs and cuddles?” He asked and Bambam nodded.

“Do you feel younger than twenty-one, like way younger, like a kid?” 

“How did you know?” Bambam breathed, his eyes tearing up and Jackson reached out, putting his hand on Bambam’s knee. 

“You’re a little Bam,” Jackson explained softly and he frowned. 

“A little what?” He asked and Jackson sighed, rolling his eyes. 

“Cut it with the bratty attitude,” He warned and he watched Bambam’s eyes widen. 

“Sorry,” He whispered.

“How old are you?” He asked Bambam and he cleared his throat. 

“Twenty-one,” He explained after a couple second’s hesitation. 

“But how old are you really?” He asked and Bambam shrugged.

“I don’t know,” He whispered and Jackson rubbed his hands over the youngers thigh. 

“That’s okay, it’s okay that you don’t know yet. Daddy’s going to take care of you anyway,” Jackson spoke and Bambam looked up at him. 

“Daddy?” He asked, his voice small, and Jackson rubbed over his knee soothingly. 

He knew Bambam was falling back into little space, and he wanted to talk to him before he fully dropped, wanted to figure out exactly what Bambam wanted from this. 

“If that’s what you need, if it helps you, I want to be your Daddy, is that okay with you baby boy?” He asked and Bambam nodded, his eyes saucers as he stared up at Jackson.

“Use your words,” Jackson said and Bambam cleared his throat. 

“Yes Daddy,” He spoke, his voice quiet and childlike.

“Alright, so we’ve got to go over a couple of things,” Jackson said as he sat across from Bambam on the couch. 

Bambam was curled up on the cushion, his knees tucked into his chest as he sipped on a drink. 

“Like what?” Bambam asked and Jackson pulled his phone out, opening his memos. 

“Did you do what I asked you to do?” Jackson asked, and Bambam nodded. 

After Bambam’s last session in which they did nothing but lay in Bambam’s bed and cuddle, Jackson told him to look up things about little space, to figure out what it was that he wanted from this, so Jackson could be better suited to take care of him. 

“Yes,” Bambam said, pulling at his sleeves so that they were over his fingers. He put them over his cheeks as if to hide his embarrassment and Jackson cleared his throat. 

“Hey, stay here okay, can you stay big for a little bit?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded, blinking as if he were clearing his head. 

“What did you find?” He asked and Bambam cleared his throat. 

“A lot of stuff, too much stuff, it made my head hurt,” Bambam said, rubbing at his temples. 

Jackson knew that he was trying hard to not slip, and he was proud of him for it. 

“Okay, was there anything you liked, anything you didn’t?” He asked and Bambam nodded, his hand coming to play in his hair. 

Jackson reached across the small space, pulling his hand down so that he wouldn’t play in his hair. 

“Um- there were some things that I liked, and some that I didn’t so much, this is too hard, can’t you just tell me how to do it?” Bambam complained, resituating so that he was sitting with his legs crisscrossed. He put his hands in his lap and looked up at Jackson hopefully. 

“This is your little space, not mine, I can’t make all of the decisions for you, you’ve got to let me know what you’re comfortable with, and what you’re not,” Jackson explained gently and Bambam shrugged. 

“I’m okay with whatever,” He complained and Jackson stared down the younger member. 

“Everything? Okay. Then I’ll ask you some things, and you tell me if it’s okay,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded. 

“Sex,” Jackson said bluntly. 

That was one of the first things that he’d encountered when he began his research, so he was sure that Bambam had come across it.

“What?” Bambam asked, his face scrunching up in confusion.

“Do you want me to have sex with you in little space? Is that something you’re comfortable with? Do you want Daddy to take care of you that way?” Jackson asked, invading Bambam’s personal space. He pinned his arms against the back of the couch, pushing his chest against Bambam’s

“No, hell no,” Bambam spat out, coming up slightly from the headspace and pushing at Jackson’s arms.

“Hey, language, and I thought so. This is why you have to tell me what you’re comfortable with,” Jackson said and Bambam frowned. 

“You want to have sex with me in littlespace?” He asked and Jackson scoffed.

“No, of course not. It’s the principle. I know you saw that when you looked it up. There are some sexual relationships in this, and if it had been anyone else, you could have been taken advantage of. You have to tell me what you don’t like so that I don’t do anything to hurt you, or make you uncomfortable,” He explained softly, moving to sit back on the opposite couch. 

“I don’t- I don’t like the nickname baby boy,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded, typing that into his notes. 

“Okay, that’s good to know. Anything else? Did you figure out how old you are in that space?” He asked and Bambam shrugged.

“Somewhere between three and five, I think. It changes, the longer I stay in I think,” Bambam said and Jackson made a note of it. 

“I uh- I made a couple of notes,” Bambam said, leaning forward and rifling through his coffee table draw to pull out a binder.

It had rilakkuma and hello kitty stickers covering the front along with decorative washi tape. 

“I got carried away,” Bambam said, his face red as he cradled the binder. 

“Let me see it baby b- Prince,” Jackson said, adjusting the pet name and Bambam blushed. 

“I like that one,” Bambam whispered and Jackson furrowed his brow.

“Huh?” He asked and Bambam swallowed. 

“That uh- that pet name. I like it,” Bambam admitted before flipping open his notebook.

“I made uh- just a rough list of things that I thought sounded nice. Like rules that I liked, or like things that I’d like to do while I’m little,” Bambam explained shakily and Jackson waved him over to hand him the book. 

Bambam gave him the book and Jackson flipped through the pages. 

“There’s not that many pages,” He pointed out and Bambam nodded. 

“I uh- I got too little to write,” Bambam said and Jackson hummed. 

“Okay, well, then I’ll have to help you, that’s okay, let’s work on rules first alright? Rules for me, and rules for you, then we can work through the rest, alright?” He asked and Bambam nodded, reaching for the notebook. 

“I think- Daddy should be good at cuddling, and he shouldn’t yell at me, and he should be understanding, and not mean, and help me when I can’t do something. He can’t ignore me, or make me feel bad for being little,” Bambam said softly, scribbling it into his book and Jackson nodded. 

He’d seen the beginning of that list earlier when he’d flipped through the book. 

“Daddy should also give me hugs when I want them, and he should let me sit on his lap, and sometimes carry me if I’m tired,” Bambam explained.

“I will do my best to follow those,” Jackson agreed to the rules. 

“What rules do you want?” He asked and Jackson thought about it. 

“Uh- Prince should always tell me when something’s too much for him, I can’t help if I don’t know. You should tell me if you’re feeling bad, uh, I want to know when you’re dropping, even if I’m not there, that way if you need anything, I can know how to help. No secrets from me, You shouldn’t talk back, or get bratty, You will follow all bedtime rules. and uh- I shouldn’t have to remind you of rules,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded, writing frantically. 

“You should take care of yourself, eat three meals, make sure you shower, get off your phone at bedtime,” Jackson added and Bambam nodded.

“Okay, those sound reasonable, can you agree to those?” He asked. He thought having more structure might help. A lot of the things he’d read online made sure that the littles had schedules, and rules about basic hygiene and self-care. He thought it made sense, those decisions were some of the easiest to control, but the hardest to follow. Especially in their line of work, it was easy not to go to bed until five in the morning and then drag yourself back out of bed two hours later, ready to hop back on stage. But if he could help Bambam manage the stress through little ways like this, it might make the bigger decisions easier to manage. 

“Those sound fair,” Bambam said with a smile and Jackson smiled back.

They’d have to talk about punishments if that was even what Bambam wanted, but now, this was good, it was strange, but he was glad they were getting on common ground.


	3. Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jackson accidentally leaves Bambam alone and they discuss punishment.

Jackson stepped into his boots, grabbing his jacket. 

“Where are you going?” Mark asked as Jackson opened the door. 

He turned to look at the older man. 

“I’m headed over to Bam’s,” Jackson answered and Mark frowned. 

“Again? That’s the third time this week.”

“Yeah, I know, I just- he’s going through some stuff, so I’m helping him out,” Jackson said unhelpfully. 

“Oh really? What kind of stuff?” Mark asked and Jackson swallowed. 

How could he explain to Mark that Bambam was so stressed out that he’d resorted to using baby talk and calling one of his friends daddy? 

“Just stress and relationship stuff. He’s been fighting with Yugyeom lately, so he asked me to come over and do some stuff with him to fix it,” Jackson said vaguely. 

“Oh, like what?” Mark asked and Jackson waved his hand around. 

“You know, we’re just talking and stuff,” He explained and Mark frowned. 

“Well, don’t you want to stay home with me, I’m sure we can think of something else to do,” Mark purred as he nodded back towards the bedroom.

Jackson looked down at his phone before looking over at Mark.

“Yeah, yeah okay,” Jackson said, putting his phone on the table before following Mark into the bedroom. 

Mark straddled him, pushing him back so that he was laying down. 

“Daddy, I need you,” Mark spoke sensually and Jackson did his best not to cringe. 

Admittedly, it was still hot. There was something about Mark’s voice that set him off, no matter what.

But to say that sentence-- even though it was a completely different scenario, it still creeped him out. He couldn’t stop thinking about Bambam. 

“Don’t call me that,” Jackson complained and Mark raised an eyebrow. 

“Would you prefer sir?” He asked and Jackson shrugged. 

“Anything but Daddy,” Jackson said before flipping Mark over on the bed so that he was straddling him before leaning down to kiss the boy.

  
  


Jackson got out of bed, looking back at Mark, who was sleeping. He seemed to be still enjoying the break that the band was on. The space between comebacks was always relaxing for Mark, who didn’t have too many engagements to do. Unlike Jackson, who seemed to be stretched thin with so many guest spots, variety shows, his own music, and his family.

“Where are you going?” Mark asked and Jackson rubbed his hand over the older man’s shoulder. 

“I’m just going to find my phone, then maybe to work out,” Jackson said and Mark shook his head. 

“Have fun, I’m staying asleep,” He complained and Jackson kissed him on the forehead. 

“I’ll see you in a couple of hours,” Jackson whispered sweetly. 

“Okay, come back to me,” Mark said with a yawn before rolling over onto his stomach. 

“I will,” He said before opening the bedroom door. 

He took a shower before heading over to his phone, already suited up and ready to head to the gym. 

It must have died last night while it was sitting on the table.

He decided to leave it off so that he could get a good workout before turning it on. 

He headed to the gym, doing a solid hour of work before taking another shower. 

He plugged his phone in, rubbing a towel through his hair as he waited for his messages to boot up.

His phone began to ding as he got text after text. 

_ Bam: Hey, what time are you coming over? _

_ Bam: I’m waiting on you _

_ Bam: I’m slipping _

_ Bam: Daddy I’m ready for my treat _

_ Bam: I’ve been a very good boy 😋 _

_ Bam: Daddy, when are you coming _

_ Bam: Daddy answer the phone _

_ Bam: Daddy, _

_ Bam: Daddy why are you ignoring me? _

_ Bam: Did I do something wrong? _

_ Bam: Daddy _

Jackson swore, realizing that most of those texts were from last night, and everything had been quiet since then. 

He’d left him alone after specifically telling Bambam to tell him if he slipped into little space. 

Jackson got dressed quickly, racing over to Bambam’s apartment building. He bypassed knocking, instead, punching in the code quickly.

The living room was empty, the cats climbing over the furniture lazily. 

He ran his hands over one of the cat's heads, scratching between its ears lazily as he resituated the bags that he was holding in his other hand. 

He’d brought Bambam a couple of new things yesterday that he was supposed to bring Bambam and that he’d promised the little that he would love. 

He moved to Bambam’s bedroom, knocking on the door. 

Jackson had woken up early, so when he got no answer, he assumed that he was still asleep. 

He pushed at the door, only find that there was something heavy in front of it. 

He continued to push, dislodging the object and opening the door to find that a chair had been pushed in front of the door. 

Bambam was slumped over on the floor in the corner, ripped up paper and clothes surrounding him. 

His bed was completely stripped and Jackson could see that he still had dried tear tracks on his face. 

“Bam?” He called out and the boy startled out of his sleep. 

“You didn’t- You left me,” Bambam whimpered and Jackson dropped his bags. He moved to collect the boy in his arms. He must have had a complete drop last night because he was still in the space. 

“No, I’m sorry, I was coming, I promise,” Jackson said and Bambam whimpered, pushing Jackson away from him.

“No, you ignored noo. Noo thought you were never coming back. Noo was all alone,” He cried and Jackson gathered him in his arms. 

“I know, and I’m sorry. I’ll do better next time, Daddy didn’t mean to leave you all alone, but I brought you some treats, do you want them?” Jackson said and Bambam nodded softly, still looking afraid that Jackson would disappear. 

It broke his heart. 

“You bought me a new teddy,” Bambam said, holding the black panther doll to his chest and Jackson nodded. 

“Maybe you can hug that if Daddy ever takes too long to come to you, okay?” He asked and Bambam nodded. 

“But, you’ll come next time, right?” He asked and Jackson nodded. 

He’d have to get Bambam out of the space soon, because they needed to talk about his meltdown, and what they would do about punishments, and whether Bambam was even open to all of the things that he’d brought him-- including a pacifier that had gotten him some weird looks, but right not he felt obligated to take care of him as a little for just a while longer. 

He deserved it. 

Jackson sat at the table with Bambam, watching the boy pick at his food. He’d made him an American breakfast because it was something sweet, and he felt bad for leaving him to his own devices. It was as close as he’d get to having candy or cake for breakfast and took a lot to allow the younger to pump his stomach full of sugar like that. He’d changed his outfit into a big comfy sweater and sweatpants to block the chill of the sparsely decorated apartment. He looked comfortable and young, even though he wasn’t wearing a onesie or something specially made for children. 

Bambam looked up at Jackson, holding his arms up and Jackson sighed, opening his arms to the younger. Bambam crawled out of his chair, scrambling into Jackson’s lap before pressing a sticky kiss to his lips.

He went back to picking at Jackson’s plate as if he hadn’t just kissed him on the lips, so Jackson just let it go. 

He’d kissed his own niece on the lips before, and it didn’t mean other than familial attachment and affection, and he didn’t doubt Bambam felt the same.

“We’ve got to talk, Prince,” Jackson said softly and Bambam shook his head, crossing his arms. 

“I don’t want to talk, I want to color. Can we color?” He asked and Jackson nodded, wiping away some of the sugary sweet substance that was sticking to Bambam’s cheeks.

“Go wash your hands and wash your face, and we can color in the living room,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded, hopping off of his lap and heading to the bathroom. 

Jackson moved the plates to the dishwasher before going into the living room. 

Bambam was sitting on the carpet, his feet tucked under the coffee table. 

It was almost comedic seeing his long legs stretching across the short space. 

“I’ve got some coloring pages I printed off. I only got one, because I ripped them up waiting for daddy last night,” Bambam babbled, pulling out a pack of colored pencils. 

“Here Daddy, we’ll use colored pencils, because you’re a big boy,” He said before beginning to color in the drawing. 

“Do you want to talk?” Jackson asked and Bambam shrugged. 

“Okay, I’ll go first, I’m starting to think that Candy and Fruit are almost the same things, only fruit is a lot better for you, but is oranges really better than chocolate? I don’t know,” Bambam said seriously and Jackson stifled the laugh in his chest. 

“Are you laughing at me?” Bambam asked, looking up at Jackson and Jackson shook his head.

“No, of course not,” Jackson said and Bambam hummed, continuing to run his colored pencil across his paper. 

“Daddy broke a rule, so he needs to be punished,” Bambam said and Jackson laughed. 

“You are laughing at me! You’re breaking a lot of rules Daddy, you laughed at me and you left me alone,” Bambam huffed and Jackson rubbed his hand over his mouth. 

“I didn’t mean to laugh at you baby, I just thought the way you said it was funny, we do need to talk about punishments though, why don’t you help me come up with some punishments,” Jackson said and Bambam sighed.

“You’re the daddy, you’re the one who’s supposed to make the punishments,” Bambam complained.

“Alright, then time outs, and then if that doesn’t work, I’m taking your phone,” Jackson suggested and Bambam. 

“Then give me your phone then Daddy,” Bambam said, snatching the phone off of the table. 

“Why are you taking my phone? What happened to time out?” Jackson asked and Bambam shook his head. 

“You were in time out last night because you didn’t come, so now I have your phone because you laughed at me,” Bambam pointed out and Jackson sighed, knowing he shouldn’t give into Bambam right now, but knew he was doing it because he still felt so bad about leaving him last night. 

Bambam tucked his phone into the pocket of the oversized sweater that he was wearing, no doubt one of Yugyeom’s before going back to his coloring. Clothes would be the next thing Jackson got for him.

Jackson looked up from the blank sheet of paper that he was scribbling on to hear the sound of Bambam’s phone ringing. 

“Prince,” Jackson started and Bambam shook his head. 

“Nope, Daddy’s phone is still in time out,” Bambam said. 

The boy was still in little space. 

“Baby, that’s your phone,” Jackson pointed out. 

“Oh, Noo is silly,” Bambam said, smacking his forehead exaggeratedly.

He took the phone out of his pocket, answering it in Thai. 

Bambam had the habit of speaking Thai when he dropped. He seemed to go through the three languages that he knew rapidly as if he hadn’t realized that he’d done so and Jackson just tried to figure it out from the context clues. 

“Oh- Yeah, hey Yugyeom,” Bambam said, his voice lower as he was clearly forcing himself up to talk to Yugyeom. 

“No, not right now, my room’s really dirty,” Bambam said and Jackson watched the interaction curiously.

Bambam came out of his headspace really quickly, which wasn’t something that he was used to, especially when Bambam was so deep in the first place. 

“Okay, let me clean up first, yes it’s dirty, I’m not just saying it, Okay, I’ll see you in twenty minutes, love you too ugly,” Bambam joked before hanging up the phone. 

“Hey, you back up?” Jackson asked awkwardly and Bambam looked down where his hands were still clutching the colored pencil. 

“Yeah, I’m up, thanks for coming,” Bambam said as he shuffled the papers back into the drawer of the coffee table. 

Jackson moved to the bedroom with Bambam, helping him to stash the things that he’d torn out of the bag back in. He pushed the items into the back of the closet. 

“I’ll call you when I go through the whole bag. Thank you for buying me that stuff,” Bambam said and Jackson shrugged. 

“It’s fine, it’s what I’m supposed to do, right?” He asked and Bambam shrugged again. 

“Look, I’m sorry for last night, I-” Jackson began.

The door opened and Bambam startled, looking at it. Jackson watched his eyes widen and the aborted motion in which he reached for him. 

He’d dropped briefly. 

“You idiot! I told you to come in twenty minutes, not now, how did you even get here so fast?” Bambam said, back to his old self.

“I know, I just missed you,” Yugyeom said, wrapping his arms around the thin boy. 

He finally looked over at Jackson. 

“Oh, hyung, I didn’t expect you to be here, I thought you said no one was allowed to see your room dirty?” Yugyeom asked and Bambam shrugged. 

“I left my jacket over and came to get it, I was leaving,” Jackson pointed out and Yugyeom nodded before his hands sunk lower on Bambam’s waist. 

“Get off of me,” Bambam pouted and Yugyeom leaned down, pressing his mouth firmly against bambam’s who just tilted his head and let him do so. 

Jackson felt awkward just standing and watching so he decided to leave. 

He opened the bedroom door before catching Bambam’s wide eyes as Yugyeom kissed down his neck.

He left anyway.


	4. Warning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jackson tries not to blur the lines and Jinyoung gives him a warning.

Jackson walked into the dorm, drinks in his hand. 

They were having a group sleepover, the first since this whole thing with Bambam started. They were going to watch movies and drink and be together since they hadn’t had the chance to do so in a while. It was important for them to have their own space to survive as a group, but it was even more important for them to be able to come together like this to maintain their relationships. 

Jackson caught Bambam’s arm as the younger ran by.

“Yes, Hyung?” Bambam asked, exasperated.

“Hey, you okay?” He asked and Bambam nodded.

“I'm sorry I left you so fast when Yugyeom came over.”

“Don't worry, he took care of me,” Bambam said with a smirk.

“Did you- you told him you were little?” Jackson hissed, looking around to see if anyone heard them. Bambam yanked his arm out of Jackson's grip.

“No, I meant he…” Bambam started and Jackson clapped a hand over Bambam's mouth.

“Gross, I don't want to hear that,” Jackson complained and Bambam just shrugged, walking off.

Bambam hadn't texted him about dropping in a couple of days, which meant either he hadn't dropped-- which was unlikely, or that he wasn't telling him he dropped.

Jackson couldn't help but worry.

He went to put the drinks in the kitchen before plopping on the couch next to Mark. 

“Seunie, what were you talking to Bambam about?” Mark asked and Jackson shook his head. 

“I was asking him to help me bring the drinks to the kitchen, and he was being a brat,” Jackson excused before wrapping his arms around Mark. 

Yugyeom and Bambam plopped down on the armchair opposite of him and Mark, Bambam scooting into Yugyeom’s lap. 

Jaebum and Jinyoung joined them, Jinyoung and Jaebum dropping onto the couch next to them.

“Ugh- I thought this was supposed to be a group night, not couples orgy,” Youngjae complained as he squeezed between Jinyoung and Jaebum. 

“Don’t be mad because you’re forever alone,” Yugyeom teased and Youngjae scoffed at him. 

“Was that supposed to be an insult?” Youngjae said before stretching out even more on the couch, nearly toppling Jaebum over the side of the couch. 

Jaebum smacked him in the head before getting up to put the movie on.

Jackson couldn’t help his eyes drifting from the movie, some horror movie that Mark picked out that was honestly a little too scary for him, to the youngest members on the armchair in front of his. 

Bambam was pushed as far back as possible onto Yugyeom and was bracing himself on his knees as he undulated his hips. Yugyeom’s hand was wrapped around Bambam’s stomach, keeping him close to him and Bambam’s head was turned to kiss Yugyeom. 

It bothered him, it shouldn’t have, but it did. 

He knew rationally that Bambam wasn’t actually a child, but after Jackson saw him the headspace, it wasn’t hard to continue to see him that way. 

He’d done his research before this, he knew that he was only supposed to be his daddy when he was little, but it was honestly annoying watching Yugyeom slob down Bambam. 

“Prince,” Jackson said and Bambam’s head snapped over to look at Jackson. 

“Huh?” Bambam asked and Jackson pointed to the floor beside his chair.

“Come sit over here,” Jackson said and Bambam climbed off of a very embarrassed Yugyeom to sit on the floor next to him. Jackson put his hands in Bambam’s hair, petting over him gently and Bambam leaned on Jackson’s legs, his hands fidgeting together before trailing up to play with his lips. 

“What’s going on?” Mark asked before looking down at where Jackson’s hand was. 

“Are you scared, you can hold my hand,” Mark said, grabbing his hand and Bambam lowered his hand from his lips, tucking it under his knees.

“What’s with you cockblocking Yugyeom and Bambam?” Mark asked as he removed his earrings. Jackson shrugged, taking off his socks as he sat down on the bed. 

“I wasn’t cockblocking,” Jackson complained. 

“I thought you said they were fighting,” Mark said and Jackson shrugged again. 

“I guess not anymore, judging by how close they were,” Mark said.

“Do you know how annoying it is to see the two of them going at it?” Jackson asked and Mark shrugged.

“Them fucking on the furniture is just background to me now,” Mark said as he laid down. 

“It’s gross though, I one hundred percent never need to see the face Yugyeom makes when he cums,” Jackson said with a shudder. 

“Or Bambam,” Mark pointed out quietly. 

“Yeah of course, but you know whose face I bet is hot when they cum,” Jackson teased, laying over Mark and Mark flicked his nose. 

“Whose,” He asked playfully. 

“Jaebum,” he teased and Mark punched him in the shoulder before wrestling so that he was on top of Jackson. 

“It’s kind of ugly, really, but Jinyoung’s… A plus, way better than Jackson’s,” Mark teased before leaning down to kiss Jackson. 

“Just kidding,” He whispered.

“I love you,” He spoke, his voice serious and Jackson looked into his eyes. 

“I love you too,” He whispered before kissing him again. 

Jackson knocked on Bambam’s door, rubbing his hands together. 

It’d been two days since Got7 all got together, and it’d been way too long for Bambam to have gone without dropping into little space, especially not after how often he’d been doing it before Jackson became his caregiver. 

The door opened and Bambam stood there, his fists rubbing at his eyes and his sweater covering said fists. 

“Prince,” Jackson said softly and Bambam frowned at him.

“What are you doing here, Noo didn’t call Daddy,” Bambam said petulantly. Jackson closed the door behind him and Bambam stepped to the side to get out of his path. 

“Yeah, I know you didn’t,” Jackson said and Bambam crossed his arms pouting. 

“What are the rules?” Jackson asked and Bambam rolled his eyes. 

“I don’t know,” Bambam pushed and Jackson sighed. 

“You’re supposed to tell me when you drop, and I shouldn’t have to remind you of my rules,” Jackson hissed and Bambam sighed. 

“Sorry,” He said grumpily and Jackson pointed to the couch. 

“Time out,” He said and Bambam stomped to the couch, plopping on it and crossing his arms and legs stubbornly. 

Jackson moved further in the house, checking the state of things while he waited for Bambam’s time out to be over with so that he could talk to him. 

Jackson walked into Bambam’s room to see that the bag that he’d brought the other day with all of his treats was still in the closet. 

So he was in littlespace, but rejecting Jackson’s stuff. 

What the hell was going on with him?

He heard a noise and he walked into the living room to find Bambam watching something on his phone. 

“Hey, you’re in time out, that means no technology, two more minutes,” Jackson added, taking his phone and Bambam stuck his tongue out at Jackson. 

He turned his back before turning to watch Bambam getting off of the couch to grab the crayons. 

“Hey! I said you’re in time out and I mean that! Sit on the couch right now and don’t you move!” Jackson yelled and Bambam’s face crumpled as he began to cry. 

Jackson let him cry, going to check the fridge to see if he had any food. 

He came back to see Bambam curled up on the couch. 

“Your timeout’s over, come on,” Jackson said and Bambam shook his head, tucking into himself. 

“Prince, come on,” Jackson started and Bambam shook his head again. 

“You yelled at me. I don’t like that,” Bambam cried and Jackson sat on the couch, maneuvering him to that he was in his lap. 

“Daddy’s sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Jackson whispered, rocking him slightly. 

“I don’t like yelling, don’t yell at me,” Bambam whispered and Jackson nodded.

“Hey, you didn’t open your treats, come on, let’s go open them,” Jackson pointed out once Bambam had calmed down and Bambam nodded, clinging onto Jackson, obviously wanting him to carry him to his room. Jackson did so, putting him down on his bed before grabbing the bag. 

He turned it over and Bambam marveled over the stickers and bubble containers. There were a couple of superhero printed sweatshirts and socks to make him feel younger, as well as a black panther water bottle that was reminiscent of a sippy cup. 

There were things that Jackson wasn’t sure how Bambam would feel about them, but he figured it was better to get it for him than to not and make him feel uncomfortable. 

“What’s this?” Bambam asked, picking up the item he was talking about. It was a blue and white pacifier that he’d bought on amazon. 

“I uh- you don’t have to use it, I know you’re a little too old for it,” Jackson said, going to grab it from him and Bambam held it to his chest. 

“No, I want it,” Bambam said, turning his body slightly to keep Jackson from taking it from him. 

Jackson put his hands down. 

“Okay, it’s yours,” Jackson said softly.

“Thank you, Daddy,” Bambam whispered, his cheeks painted in red.

_ Bam: Daddy!!! _

Jackson looked down at his phone to see that Bambam had texted him. 

_ Me: Yes Prince? _

_ Bam: I slipped _

_ Me: I know, what are you doing? _

_ Bam: I’m laying in bed _

_ Me: Playing with the toys daddy bought you? _

_ Bam: Maybe…. 😁 _

_ Bam: Are you coming over? _

_ Me: Can’t, hanging with Mark today, but maybe tomorrow _

_ Me: send me a pic _

_ Bam: No, Mark’s more important than me _

_ me: Bam _

_ Me: are you mad at Daddy _

_ Me: answer me _

_ Me: You’re going to get it when I come over _

_ Bam:😝 _

Jackson’s doorbell rang and he looked up at the clock. He was supposed to go get Mark in an hour. Why would Mark show up now?

Jackson got out of bed, tossing his phone on the blanket before going to the door. 

“I’m coming,” Jackson called, wondering why Mark didn’t just put the code in. It wasn’t like he didn’t already know the code, Mark knew everything about Jackson.

Or, nearly everything. 

“Why didn’t you just use the code babe-” Jackson started as he opened the door. 

“I’m not your babe, lucky for you, and I think it’s rude to intrude,” Jinyoung said, leaning against the door jamb before pushing past Jackson and into the apartment. 

“Well, that’s some bullshit. I’m sorry to say it, but I’m kind of in the middle of something right now, Mark’s coming in an hour so I have to get some stuff together, so you need to leave,” Jackson said and Jinyoung held his hand up, walking around the apartment. 

“What are you doing?” Jackson asked as Jinyoung opened the closet door in the hall. He moved further into the house, opening his bathroom door, checking his closets, and looking under his bed. 

“Who are you looking for?”Jackson asked and Jinyoung turned on him, tilting his head. 

“Who said I’m looking for someone? Why would you assume I’m looking for someone?” Jinyoung asked, squinting at him and Jackson furrowed his eyebrows. 

“If you and Jaebum got into a fight, I can guarantee that he’s not here,” Jackson said and Jinyoung shook his head. 

“Don’t worry, Me and Jaebum’s relationship is fine,” He said pointedly and Jackson shook his head. 

He had no idea what the hell was going on with Jinyoung, and he kind of didn’t want to find out. 

He had plans, dicking down Mark plans that he honestly didn’t want Jinyoung around for.

“Where’s Bambam?” Jinyoung asked and Jackson frowned. 

“I don’t know, probably his house,” Jackson said as if it were obvious. He knew he was at his house, but he had no idea why Jinyoung would ask him. 

“What’s going on with him anyway?” Jinyoung asked and Jackson shrugged again, looking away from Jinyoung. 

“I don’t know, why don’t you ask Yugyeom, his boyfriend, or better yet, just ask him,” Jackson answered and Jinyoung sucked his teeth. 

“Genius, really. Look, you’re not stupid Jackson, and neither am I. So I’m just going to say it straight up. Quit it now, I won’t tell anyone, but you stop it. Mark loves you, and you love him, so just stop before he gets hurt,” Jinyoung said seriously and Jackson frowned at him. 

“What are you talking about?”

“The thing with Bam, end it, got it?” Jinyoung said and Jackson tried to stare him down. 

He couldn’t know what was going on with Bambam. Jackson couldn’t just end it like that. 

“I understand,” Jackson said and Jinyoung nodded slightly before looking around the apartment one last time. 

“Enjoy your date with Mark,” Jinyoung said cutely before walking out of the apartment. Jackson stared after him, trying to understand exactly what the hell Jinyoung was thinking. 


	5. Spanking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bambam crosses a line, and Jackson does his best to maintain his chill.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The spanking is not really negotiated. but bambam is okay with it.

Jackson entered the apartment, kicking his shoes off at the door. He’d brought by something new, something that he’d worked on last night after Mark fell asleep. They’d had a great night, Mark had seemed so genuinely interested in everything Jackson said and was making real efforts to talk more. It wasn’t like Mark didn’t talk around Jackson, because when he was excited, Mark could talk for a while, but everything that Mark said seemed to come from the heart. Their date convinced Jackson that Jinyoung and Jaebum had to have fought and Jinyoung was just projecting, or something because there was nothing wrong with them at all. 

“Prince, I’m here,” Jackson called as he dropped the gift on the table. He walked through the house, going to check out the fridge. 

“Have you eaten yet?” Jackson called. 

“No daddy!” Bambam called from his room, and Jackson sighed, going to pull out some chicken nuggets. 

He’d bought him some last time he was over, because Bambam seemed to really like them, and it seemed like something Bambam could make for himself while he was in little space. 

Jackson knew that Bam wasn’t an actual child, but the way his mind seemed to drift from topic to topic, Jackson didn’t trust anything he couldn’t microwave while the boy was under. 

He pulled the plate out of the microwave before taking it to Bambam’s room. 

Bambam was laying in bed, his blankets pushed down to his ankles. 

“What are you doing?” Jackson asked as he put the food on his dresser. 

Older Bambam would kill him if he ever did this, but little Bambam didn’t care about heat rings on his furniture. 

“Playing a game that gyeomy taught me,” Bambam said with a giggle and Jackson raised an eyebrow.

What game could Yugyeom have taught him? 

“Oh really? Is it fun?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded quickly.

“It’s really fun, I played it yesterday when Daddy wouldn’t come over,” Bambam said with a small pout and Jackson grabbed the nuggets, sitting on the bed next to him. 

“I’m sorry, do you want Daddy to play with you?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded grabbing Jackson’s hand that wasn’t preoccupied with chicken nuggets.

“You have to go first since you haven’t played before,” Bambam said before taking Jackson’s hand and putting it in Bambam’s lap.

Bambam rubbed Jackson’s hand back and forth and Jackson snatched it away. 

“What are you doing? I told you, this isn’t sexual, cut it out, now,” Jackson hissed at him and Bambam pouted, putting his own hand in his pants. 

“It’s not sexual, it’s fun, me and gyeomy play it a lot, it feels really good daddy,” Bambam spoke insistently.

“Bam- that’s not- I’m not going to sit and watch you masturbate, that’s fucking weird,” Jackson said and Bambam popped his lips. 

“Fucking, fucking, fucking, fucking,” He repeated after Jackson with a hum. 

“Stop that,” Jackson said, feeling a little like he was losing control.

He didn’t know how to handle this, he knew that he wasn’t supposed to judge Bambam’s little space, but at the same time, he didn’t sign up for this shit either. This was supposed to be a purely non-sexual thing, and now Bambam was writhing around his bed, muttering fucking with his hands down his pants and Jackson was holding a plate of chicken nuggets about to witness a friend/child-- he wasn’t sure what the distinction was at this point-- have an orgasm.

Bambam keened, his head thrown back and his eyes closed. He giggled as his chest heaved, pushing his hands through his hair and Jackson covered his eyes, throwing the chicken nuggets on the floor in the process because he now knew what Bambam looked like when he orgasmed, and he honestly wanted to scrub his brain.

“See Daddy, it’s fun, now it’s my go,” Bambam said, reaching towards Jackson before looking down at the ground. 

“Oh, my chicken nuggets,” He said sadly. 

Jackson grabbed Bambam’s wrist, pulling him from the bed. 

“What are you doing?” Bambam asked and Jackson laid Bambam over his knee before swatting his thighs. 

“When I tell you to do something, you do it, do you understand me?” Jackson asked through his teeth. 

There was probably too much anger there and a lot of humiliation, and he should never come to punishment with those types of emotions, but something had to be done. He wasn’t stupid. Bambam couldn’t do timeouts any more than he could as a child. Mark, mark probably got in time out as a child, Jinyoung too and that worked for them, but not Jackson, he was not a timeout type of child, he could entertain himself with anything, timeouts weren’t punishment enough for him, and they certainly weren’t enough for Bambam. 

“I said do you understand me?” Jackson asked again and Bambam buried his head in the blanket as Jackson swatted his thighs three more times. 

Bambam’s hands were curled up in the blanket, but his body was pliant as he hiccuped out little sobs. 

“Yes sir,” Bambam whispered finally and Jackson rubbed over his thighs before sitting him upright on his lap, wiping away his tears. 

“Are you okay?” Jackson asked tentatively and Bambam nodded, his fist balled up as he brought it to his mouth. 

“I’m sorry for not listening, it’s really fun though,” Bambam complained and Jackson sighed. 

“I bet, but that’s not a good thing for little boys to do, not in front of other people especially, and not with other people,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded, chewing on his fist.

“I’m sticky and hungry, and my chicken nuggets are on the floor,” Bambam complained and Jackson cooed, rubbing his back. 

“Come on, we’ll go have a bath, and then make more chicken nuggets alright?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded, wrapping his arms around Jackson’s shoulders. 

Jackson lifted him with a grunt before taking him to the bathroom, starting a bath. 

“I’ll clean up the chicken nuggets and make you some more while you shower, okay?” He asked and Bambam nodded, sitting on the toilet. 

“Is your bottom okay?” Jackson asked, before wincing at the thought that maybe his bottom wasn’t okay because he and Yugyeom- nope, he wasn’t going to worry about that right now, he was just going to go clean up his little’s room.

“I’m okay, thank you, daddy,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded, so he hadn’t come up after the spanking, he was probably okay with it. 

He brought Bambam something to put on before going back to Bambam’s room. 

He got on his hands and knees, picking up the breaded pieces of chicken and contemplating if maybe the line has been crossed. 

He should tell Mark, he really should tell Mark- but he couldn’t tell Mark. He wouldn’t understand, and it’d just be more problem than it was worth. He’d walked in on members  _ doing that _ before when they were younger but he’d never actually seen any of them… finish before. But he didn’t want to think about it, he needed to go make more chicken nuggets. 

Jackson walked into the kitchen, making more chicken nuggets before cutting up carrots because he had to have something to do because he was still thinking about Bambam’s face when he- Jackson needed to make him a smoothie, that would be nice. 

“Daddy?” Bambam asked from the door of the kitchen, his shirt pulled over his hands and his pacifier hanging out of his mouth.

Jackson jumped at his appearance and Bambam frowned. 

“Are you mad at noo?” Bambam asked, rubbing at his eye. 

“No, are you mad at Daddy?” Jackson asked and Bambam shook his head. 

“Come on, let’s go eat and talk, okay?” Jackson said softly and Bambam nodded, moving out of the way to let Jackson carry the plate to the coffee table. 

Bambam sat on the floor, crossing his legs as he placed his hands in his lap, waiting for Jackson to tell him it was okay to eat.

Once he did, Bambam began to eat the chicken nuggets slowly, his eyes coming up to Jackson’s every so often before looking down at his plate. 

“Let’s talk,” Jackson said and Bambam sighed. 

“Is this a big boy talk?” Bambam asked and Jackson shook his head. 

“No, it’s a talk for prince, okay?” He said and Bambam nodded. 

“What you did earlier wasn’t okay, it surprised Daddy and Daddy doesn’t like it. So we have to add some more rules, okay?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded. 

“No more doing that stuff when you’re little okay? When you’re little, no one should touch your uh- prince parts, do you understand?” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded. 

“including noo?” he asked. 

“Yes, prince can’t touch either,” Jackson said, wondering if he’d gone too far. 

“What about gyeomy?” Bambam asked. 

“Especially not gyeomy, or you’ll get another spanking, okay?” Jackson said and Bambam nodded. 

“Only Daddy,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded along, he’d never touch Bambam there anyway, so it didn’t matter.

“And no cursing, even if Daddy says a bad word, you can’t say it,” Jackson said.

“What’s that?” Bambam asked, distracting him as he pointed a carrot stick at the book on the table. 

“Oh, Daddy bought you a sticker journal, when you are good and follow all the rules, Daddy will put a sticker on your chart. When you get all your stickers full, daddy will get you a surprise,” Jackson said, opening the book to show the page. 

He’d written the rules on the inside cover, and he’d have to add the new stuff later on. 

“Can noo have a sticker now?” Bambam asked and Jackson looked at him. 

Technically he hadn’t earned one, but it was all in good faith, it would be less daunting if he started off with one.

“Of course,” Jackson said, putting a sticker on the first slot. Bambam leaned forward, kissing Jackson.

“Thanks, daddy!” Bambam said excitingly before going back to eat his food. 

Jackson watched Bambam out of the corner of his eye. 

He was trying not to draw too much attention to the fact that something was going on with Bambam. It was obvious to him that something was going on with Bambam, but that was because he’d become the younger’s caregiver, so it was completely obvious to Jackson that Bambam dropped.

Of course, he picked the absolute worse time to drop, a group meet up, and on top of that, it wasn’t a small drop, he was probably three by now, and he didn’t seem to be able to bring himself back up. 

“Bam, could you help me with something in the kitchen?” Jackson asked gently and Bambam looked up from where he’d been petting at his hair in one hand, the other pulling on his lip, so obviously trying not to put his thumb in his mouth. 

“Sure Da-”

“Come on,” Jackson said quickly, grabbing Bambam’s arm and tugging him, talking over him just loud enough to block out that consonant, because the only thing worse than them noticing would be someone hearing Bambam call him Daddy. 

“Bam, wait! Stay with me,” Yugyeom said, catching his other hand, causing Bambam to freeze between them. 

He’d been sitting between Yugyeom’s legs, looking increasingly more uncomfortable, but Yugyeom wasn’t having any luck getting any information out of the boy, at least nothing about what was going on with him.

“I need him for a second, come on Bam,” Jackson said and Yugyeom raised an eyebrow. 

“For what?” Yugyeom whined. 

“Cause I do,” Jackson snapped.

“Solid reasoning hyung, come on Bam, sit down,” Yugyeom said and Jackson glared at him. 

Why was Yugyeom being so damn belligerent?   
“You shouldn’t talk back, that’s not nice,” Bambam said quietly and Yugyeom looked at him. 

“What?” Yugyeom asked and Bambam took another step towards Jackson. 

“You’re being bratty, that’s against the rules, You’re going to get a spanking,” Bambam said and Yugyeom laughed. 

“Who’s going to spank me? You?” Yugyeom said with a small grin. 

“No, Da-”

“Bam, kitchen, now,” Jackson said more insistently and Bambam dropped Yugyeom’s hand to let Jackson lead him into the kitchen. 

“Why is noo in trouble? gyeomy’s the one not following the rules,” Bambam pouted, folding his arms across his chest and stomping his foot. 

Jackson shook his head, holding Bambam’s face in his palms. 

“He’s not a baby, not like you prince,” Jackson explained and Bambam rolled his eyes. 

“He acts like a baby,” Bambam pouted and Jackson smiled softly. 

“I know, but he’s not in trouble, and neither are you. Daddy’s worried about his Prince, when did you slip?” Jackson asked softly and Bambam shrugged, moving his hand up to slip his hand into Jackson’s. 

“Do you want to go home?” Jackson asked him and Bambam shook his head. 

“I want to play with Gyeomy and Youngjae! They’re my best friends,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded, feeling inadequate because he couldn’t really fix this. 

“I know they are, but they don’t know about little Bambam, so we have to keep it a secret,” Jackson asked and Bambam nodded, miming a shushing movement as if he were keeping it a secret.

“Good boy,” Jackson said, patting his head affectionately. 

Bambam leaned forward, kissing Jackson.

“I love you, daddy,” Bambam said sweetly and Jackson smiled softly at Bambam. 

“I love you too Prince, remember our secret,” Jackson reminded him and Bambam nodded.

“Jacks, did you grab the snacks?” Jinyoung asked as he stepped into the door and Jackson took a step back from Bambam. 

“That’s what we’re doing now,” Jackson said, reaching behind him to grab a bowl of pretzels. 

“Oh, it took you long enough, come on, the movies starting,” Jinyoung said and Jackson nodded, heading towards the living room, Jinyoung waiting for him to leave the kitchen before following after them.

Bambam trailed behind Jackson, picking at the bottom of his shirt, pulling on the edges until Jackson had to reach back to make him stop.

Jackson put the food on the table and Bambam plopped into Jackson’s lap, curling into a ball to watch the movie.

Mark looked over at them, raising his eyebrow and Jackson just shrugged, stuffing his face with pretzels to keep from having to speak. 


	6. Show Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark confronts Jackson and witnesses it himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I've been so absent over the past two weeks, a lot has happened over these two weeks in my personal life that has kept me busy.   
But since today is my Birthday, I figured I'd post and maybe that would make me feel a little better.   
So here you go! Thank you for reading and sorry for keeping you waiting. 
> 
> Also warning for a sexual situation at the end of the chapter between Mark and Jackson. It's not explicit, or well, I don't think it is, but it's there.

Jackson lifted his couch cushion, dislodging a soft toy. 

He plopped the cushion, putting his hands on his hips as he looked around the room. 

He didn’t know what was going on. He could have sworn that he’d had the phone this morning when he woke up, but somewhere between the gym and Bambam coming over, he’d somehow lost it. 

They didn’t do this. 

Little space was supposed to be a Bambam’s house sort of thing, but Bambam had shown up to Jackson’s house as he was stepping out of the shower, already dropped and crying miserably. 

Of course, Jackson was going to let him in. 

The little had complained of being lonely at his house, and that he didn’t want to be little by himself today. 

Jackson didn’t mind, Bambam’s cats had taken to using Jackson as a scratching post lately so he was more than happy not to have to be over at Bambam’s house, and with the way he lived, it just seemed warmer at Jackson’s. 

He’d played with the little for a while, some simple puzzles from the backpack that Bambam had brought and a couple of things that Jackson had been waiting to give to him.

Now, Bambam was sprawled out in the middle of Jackson’s bed, his pacifier hanging out of his mouth as he slept. 

The door beeped and Jackson looked up, trying to figure out who it would be.

Mark hadn’t texted to tell him he was coming back.

No one texted, he didn’t have his phone.

Right. 

“Mark, is that you?” Jackson asked as the door pushed open and he heard an angry huff. 

“Have you seen my phone?” Jackson asked, standing up slowly. 

He wasn’t sure what happened, but he had no doubt it probably had something to do with Yugyeom.

“You mean this?” Mark asked, whipping the phone at his head. It smacked against Jackson’s temple and he rubbed it sorely. 

“When did you get my phone?” Jackson asked, confused as to why Mark was throwing technology at him. 

“You left it on the bed this morning before the gym. I was going to bring it to you, and then I saw the messages,” Mark said bitterly. 

“What messages, what are you talking about?” Jackson asked. 

“What messages, don’t play fucking stupid with me Jackson. That’s why you didn’t want me to call you Daddy, huh? You’ve found someone younger to do it?” Mark said angrily and Jackson felt his stomach drop. 

“It’s not what you think Mark, It’s not like that,” Jackson started. 

“It’s not like that? How the fuck do I get ‘playing with the toys daddy got you’ confused? What part of ‘You’re going to get it when I come over,’ isn’t sexual,” Mark asked.

“All of it, really it’s out of context. There’s nothing like that going on between me and Bam- he’s- it’s really hard to explain, but I swear, it’s nothing like what you think,” Jackson tried to justify, his eyes darting back towards his bedroom door. 

“So you’re telling me nothing sexual has happened between you two?” Mark asked and Jackson paused. 

“He tried to get me to jerk him off- but it wasn’t what you think, it was a game, no that sounds wrong, Mark listen,” Jackson started guiltily. 

“It’s all wrong Jackson. How long have I known you? I’ve known you since 2011, I was the first person you met in Korea. I know things about you that he will never know, that he could never, and you have the nerve to- Jackson how could you?” Mark’s voice broke and Jackson shook his head. 

“I’m not- I swear, it’s not what you think, you have to believe me, I would never do that to you,” Jackson said and Mark huffed. 

“You’ve already done it, why do you keep looking back at your bed- is he here, is he here right now, after last night with me you- Jinyoung told me, but I didn’t- I didn’t believe that you would,” Mark said, trying to push past Jackson and Jackson grabbed his arm, stopping him from opening the door. 

“Let me go!” Mark yelled and Jackson’s door crept open.

“Daddy?” Bambam asked softly, rubbing at his eyes as he talked around his pacifier. 

“Did daddy wake you?” Jackson asked softly and Bambam nodded, making grabby hands at Jackson. He lifted the light boy who put his head on his shoulder. 

“You were yelling, noo was scared,” Bambam whined. 

“I know, Daddy’s sorry,” Jackson soothed.

Jackson turned slowly to look at Mark. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Mark spoke slowly and Jackson smoothed his hand over Bambam’s back. 

“So, Bambam’s a little, and I take care of him, I’m his caregiver. He’s mentally between the ages of three and five, so I make sure he eats, behaves, and gives him a safe space where he can be little so he can destress. I know it’s really strange, but- he needed me,” Jackson explained and Mark just stared at him as if he were trying to find some kind of lie in his story.

“Show me,” Mark said softly and Jackson frowned. 

“Show you what?” He asked and Mark pointed at Bambam. 

“Show me what you do, I want to see,” Mark spoke and Jackson stopped bouncing Bambam to really look at Mark.

He really wanted to see.

Jackson would have to show him.

“Is Prince hungry?” Jackson asked, his eyes going back to look at Mark uncomfortably. Bambam shook his head, his face still buried in Jackson’s shoulder. He’d been just sitting with the boy on his lap for ten minutes, Mark staring at them from across the room. Jackson knew that it was weird for Mark, but this, this was weird for him. 

It was hard to get into the role because he felt like Mark was judging everything, and Bambam- who was usually a handful- hadn’t strayed from Jackson’s hip. Of course, he wasn’t surprised. He’d spent so long cultivating this headspace, keeping as many people out as possible, it wasn’t hard to guess that Bambam was afraid of someone judging him for this. Not to mention that if anyone seemed to judge Bambam, it was Mark. It came from a familial place, Jackson knew that but Mark was one of the members who would openly chastise Bambam, who strived to make the boy stop, so of course, Bambam didn’t want to do this in front of Mark. 

“What’s wrong?” Mark asked and Jackson turned his head to look at Bambam. 

“He’s a little shy, he’s not used to- other people watching,” Jackson pointed out and Bambam turned himself so that he wasn’t straddling Jackson, but instead leaning his side against Jackson’s chest, his legs over his knees. 

Bambam had turned to look at Mark, his eyes narrowed as he stared the older boy down. Jackson patted his hip in warning, unsure of what Bambam was going to say.

“Why were you yelling at Daddy?” Bambam finally asked and Mark raised an eyebrow. 

“Because he was keeping secrets from me,” Mark answered and Bambam turned to look at Jackson.

“Daddy, you said no secrets, you broke a rule,” Bambam said and Jackson hummed. 

“Yeah, but remember, no secrets from me, you’re not supposed to keep secrets from me. This was a secret that we were keeping together,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded.

“Oh yeah.” 

He turned to look back at Mark. 

“It isn’t nice to yell though, you shouldn’t backtalk daddy, it’s against the rules, and you’ll get a spanking,” Bambam informed Mark who looked back at Jackson. 

“Spanking?” Mark asked and Jackson turned his head. 

He knew it would come up, but he didn’t want it to. 

“Yep, Daddy spanks noo when noo doesn’t behave, then he takes a sticker out of noo’s book, and noo don’t get treats. He said Noo is too bad for timeout,” Bambam explained. 

“No, I didn’t say you were too bad for timeout, I said you were bad at timeouts, you don’t like to stay still long enough for time out,” Jackson corrected him gently and Bambam shrugged before looking back at Jackson. 

“Is he gonna be here for a long time?” He asked Jackson and Jackson nodded. 

“He’s uh- he’s going to watch if that’s okay with prince?” Jackson asked and Bambam frowned, looking over at Mark. 

“Are you going to laugh at me?” He asked and Mark shook his head. 

“No, I’m not going to laugh, just watch,” Mark swore and Bambam nodded.

“Then he can stay. Look how nice I’m being daddy, Noo deserves a sticker,” Bambam gloated and Jackson shook his head, helping Bambam sit on the couch. 

“What did I tell you about telling me to give you stickers?” Jackson asked even as he put a sticker on his sheet. 

“That I’d get it faster if I didn’t remind you, but honestly Daddy, you’re so slow,” Bambam complained before sliding off of the couch. 

“Where are you going?” Jackson asked and Bambam pointed towards Jackson’s room. 

“I’m going to play games,” Bambam said and Jackson gave him a look. 

“Not that game Daddy, I’m just going to go play with t'challa,” Bambam said before skipping off to his room. 

“What’s that game?” Mark asked and Jackson shook his head. 

“It’s hard to explain,” He dodged before moving to do what he had been doing before Mark got here, cleaning up. Now that he had his phone back, he didn’t have to look for it, so he could put back all of the things he’d torn apart looking for it. 

“So you just leave him alone?” Mark asked and Jackson shrugged. 

“It- it depends on what he wants to do. Sometimes he just wants me in the house, but he doesn’t really need me to play with him, sometimes he is stuck to my side,” Jackson explained and before going to his room where Bambam was sitting on his bed, Jackson’s laptop open as he stared at the password. 

“Daddy, I forgot the password,” Bambam complained and Jackson got on the bed, typing in the password- which was Marks’ birthday, before starting a movie. 

Bambam watched those weird kid videos on Youtube, so Jackson always made sure to choose something for him to watch before those things got recommended for him.

“Thank you, Daddy,” Bambam said before snuggling in the middle of the bed, the Black Panther teddy bear tucked under his arm. Jackson put his pacifier in his mouth and Bambam sighed, settling in on the movie. 

“How old is he right now?” Mark asked and Jackson pet through his hair, looking up at him. 

“Probably three, he’s been spending a lot of time in that age recently, the longer he drops, and the intense it is, the more likely it is that he’s three, and he says noo more often when he’s three,” Jackson explained and Bambam shushed him around the movie. 

“Three-year-olds don’t use pacifiers though,” Mark pointed out and Bambam spat out his pacifier, covering his mouth with his shirt. 

“He sucks his thumb, it’s easier for him to use the pacifier, and there is nothing wrong with having a paci,” Jackson soothed Bambam, who had begun to pout. 

“You hurt his feelings,” Jackson said unhelpfully. 

“I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings,” Mark said and Bambam just rolled his eyes at Mark, turning on his side. 

“That’s not nice Prince, what did I say about being bratty?” Jackson asked and Bambam just looked up at him stubbornly. 

“Prince,” Jackson warned. 

“He’s being bratty, why are you yelling at me,” Bambam protested. 

“I’m not yelling at you, you know better. Mark doesn’t know the rules yet,” Jackson explained. 

“Then he needs to read the rules, he’s a grown-up, he’s supposed to know the rules, he’s just being mean,” Bambam argued and Jackson tried to keep a stern face on. 

“Prince is right, I was being mean. I’m sorry. Did I hurt your feelings so much?” Mark asked and Bambam nodded. 

“Well, that wasn’t nice of me. What are the punishments?” He asked and Bambam eyed him. 

“You should have gone to time out earlier, for yelling at Daddy, and then you were mean to me, which means you get your phone taken away, and if you do something else you’re going to get a spanking, so watch yourself, okay?” Bambam warned and Mark nodded, making his face serious. 

“I will,” Mark said.

“Don’t worry, I’ll talk to Daddy for you, so you don’t get into too much trouble,” Bambam whispered loudly and Mark nodded.

Bambam looked over at Jackson. 

“Does he have to go to time out? He was really nice,” Bambam asked, batting his eyelashes and Jackson smiled. 

“Mark doesn’t have to go to time out,” Jackson said and Bambam smiled, kissing Jackson.

“You get another chance,” Bambam assured Mark who thanked Bambam before looking up at Jackson with an indecipherable look in his eyes. 

“I know that was super weird, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it before,” Jackson rushed out as Mark closed his bedroom door. 

He’d taken Bambam home earlier when he’d gotten too tired to stay up. 

“It was different, but I see why you did it,” Mark said and Jackson nodded, eyeing Mark. 

“If you want me to end it, I’ll end it,” Jackson said and Mark stared at him for a while. 

“You’d end it, even if it hurt Bambam?” Mark asked and Jackson nodded. 

He liked taking care of Bambam, he liked knowing that he was helping the boy, but he loved Mark.

“Can you- can you give me some time?” He asked and Jackson frowned.

“Time for what?” He asked. 

“Time to decide how I feel about this?” Mark asked and Jackson nodded. 

“Take all the time you need,” Jackson said and Mark nodded before climbing in bed next to Jackson, turning his back on the man.

Jackson stared down at his phone as he reread over the text message. 

_ Bam: I’m little, are you coming over to play daddy? _

He looked over at Mark who was watching television, his feet in Jackson’s lap. 

_ Me: not today prince… _

“Who's that?” Mark asked, looking back at Mark.

“No one-” he started automatically before shaking his head.

There was nothing to hide anymore.

“It was just Bam. I told him to tell me if he slipped,” Jackson said and Mark raised his eyebrows with a small nod.

“Oh,” Mark said quietly.

“What does that mean?” Jackson asked and Mark shook his head.

“ nothing, its nothing,” Mark said, turning back towards the television. Jackson sighed, turning his phone over as a new text came in.

“Still Bam?” Mark asked and Jackson shrugged.

“It doesn't matter, because I'm here with you.”

“You can answer if you want,”

“No, I'm with you,” Jackson repeated.

His phone lit up with a new text.

“He texted you again,” Mark said and Jackson sighed.

“I know, but I’m watching a movie with you,” Jackson said.

“If you don't answer him back, he'll keep texting you,” Mark said and Jackson nodded.

“Yeah, and I'll keep ignoring them. I already texted him back. It's fine, let's just watch the movie, please,” Jackson spoke, exasperated.

He didn't know why this turned into such a 'non-argument’. He could tell Mark was upset, but he had no idea why he could be. Mark didn't have a reason to be upset, he was with him, not Bambam, giving Mark all the space away from the situation that he said he would.

“So… how often does he kiss you?” Mark finally asked and Jackson looked up from the movie.

“What?” Jackson asked.

“How often does he kiss you, like is that new, or?” Mark asked and Jackson shrugged.

“He does it when I make him happy. I dunno, I've never really thought of it,” Jackson said and mark made a noise.

“Oh, you've never spared a thought to another man kissing you, oh.”

“It's not like that. Really, and Bambam is hardly a man,” Jackson said and Mark nodded.

“What if he has a crush on you,” Mark asked and. Jackson scoffed.

“He's in love with Yugyeom,” Jackson said as if it were obvious.

“Yeah, big bam is,” Mark said as if it were obvious.

“From what they've done while he was in little space, I'd say little bam too,” Jackson said with disdain.

“He tried to do it with you too,” Mark pointed out and Jackson shook his head. 

“That was a misunderstanding, can we just please watch the movie?” Jackson said and Mark sat up, moving to cuddle into Jackson's side.

The discussion was tabled for another time, Mark not bringing up the situation for the rest of the movie.

Once Mark was engrossed in the movie, Jackson let himself check his messages.

_ Bam: Why is daddy being so mean to prince _

_ Bam: are you with Mark? _

_ Bam: You must be too busy for prince _

_ Bam: I’ll let it slide today, but you owe me lots of hugs and kisses. _

_ Bam: I’ll just get gweomy to take care of me _

_ Bam: don’t worry daddy, only you can touch my prince Parts _

_ Bam: I hope you come over soon! Have fun with P’mark _

_ Me: thank you for being a big boy about it Prince. Daddy will talk to you soon _

Jackson looked at the message he sent before tucking his phone into the couch cushion, focusing on Mark who was holding onto him like he wanted his attention.

Mark bit his lip as his hands traveled down his side, pulling at the tank top, and dislodging it from where it was tucked into the sweatpants that he was wearing. Netflix was asking if he were still watching, and most of the apartment was pitch black from the day shifting into the night. The TV was the only thing casting a glow, but even then, he wasn’t paying much attention to it, too busy focused on the man in his lap who was shimmying over him, trying to disrobe him.

“Let’s go to the bed,” Jackson suggested through the kiss and Mark shook his head, taking off his own shirt. 

“Don’t want to, want to do it here,” He said continuing his ministrations. Jackson couldn’t say that he didn’t enjoy handsy desperate Mark.

“Gaga,” Mark asked from above him, already prepping himself, and Jackson had to find it in himself to pay attention to what was coming out of Mark’s mouth, and not the fingers disappearing into his own heat.

“You would really stop if I told you to?” Mark asked and Jackson nodded. 

“Yes,” He said and Mark nodded, humming as he fingered himself. 

“I want to watch one more time, I just-I want to talk to him while he’s in the space, while you’re not there,” Mark said and Jackson nodded. 

“Whatever you need,” He said and Mark leaned down, linking their lips together. 

“I love you,” Mark spoke, his voice serious and Jackson couldn’t help but to repeat the sentiment as Mark sank down onto him.


	7. Observations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark observes Bambam and Jackson one more time before he makes a decision and Jinyoung confronts Jackson.

Jackson entered the code to Bambam’s apartment, shaking off his umbrella before sticking it in the corner. Mark followed him into the house, taking off his shoes. 

“Prince?” Mark called hesitantly. 

Bambam hadn’t called Jackson for a week after the last drop. He wasn’t surprised, Bambam tended to be more sensitive when Jackson didn’t come to him, but he was getting better about telling him consistently when he dropped, even when Jackson couldn’t make it. 

“I’m in my room,” Bambam called and before sticking his head out of his door. 

“Mark is here too?” Bambam asked and Jackson nodded. 

“He had so much fun playing last time, that he wanted to come back and play again. Is that okay with you Prince?” He asked and Bambam eyed Mark cautiously before shrugging. 

“Are you hungry? Maybe Daddy could go make something to eat while we talk, is that okay?” He asked and Bambam frowned at Mark. 

“He’s my Daddy, not yours,” Bambam said and Mark clenched his teeth. 

“I know, come on, let’s go color, do you like to color?” Mark asked and Bambam nodded, waving Mark into his room. 

“Go easy on him,” Jackson warned. 

“I am, don’t worry,” Mark said before disappearing into the room with Bambam. 

Jackson couldn’t help but worry though. Mark had a jealous streak, he’d always known that and used it to his advantage. Of course, he never thought that Mark would ever be jealous of Bambam, but at this point, it was evident that he was.

He moved to the kitchen, making some chicken nuggets before going to Bambam’s room door.

He pushed the door open slightly to see Mark and Bambam laying side by side on the floor, Bambam scribbling across a paper while Mark carefully filled in the lines. 

“So, you really love your daddy?” Mark asked and Jackson closed his eyes, leaning against the frame, knowing where this line of questioning was going. 

“Of course, he’s the bestest and he gives me the bestest kisses and the bestest hugs and he’s the best daddy ever,” Bambam said enthusiastically. 

“The same you love Yugyeom?” Mark asked and Bambam shook his head. 

“No,” Bambam said quietly. 

“No? Who do you love more then?” Mark questioned. 

“It’s different. Daddy makes me smile, but Gweomy, he makes my tummy flutter and my prince parts tingle and gives me cummies, only daddy says that only daddy can touch my prince parts,” Bambam divulged and Jackson’s eyes flew open. 

When the hell did he say that?

“Has daddy ever touched your prince parts?” Mark asked. 

“Once, but he didn’t want to play and I made him and he gave me a spanking,” Bambam said before looking at Mark. 

“Why are you asking so many questions?” Bambam asked and Mark shrugged.

“I just wanted to know,” He said, going back to coloring and Bambam rolled over onto his side. 

“If you get to ask questions, so do I. Are Elsa and spiderman going to get married?” Bambam asked and Jackson laughed. 

Bambam and those stupid youtube videos. 

“I don’t know, if they want to they can,” Mark said with a laugh. 

“Do you love daddy too?” Bambam asked and Mark’s face softened. 

“Yeah, I really do.” 

“So are you going to be my daddy too?”

“Do you want me to?” Mark asked. 

“Yeah, then Daddy wouldn’t have to choose between coming over here and staying with you because then you’d be over here anyway, and you and Daddy love each other anyway, so that makes you like my mommy, only you’re a boy, so you’d be my daddy too,” Bambam said and Jackson cleared his throat. 

“The chicken nuggets are done,” Jackson called and Bambam turned to look up at Jackson. 

“Daddy!” He called and Jackson leaned over, lifting him off of the floor and into a hug. 

“Come on, let’s go get something to eat, okay?” Jackson said and Bambam nodded, burying his head in Jackson’s shoulder. He looked back at Mark who was sitting up, looking at the two of them. 

“You coming daddy?” Bambam asked and Mark stared at the both of them. 

“Uh-yeah, I’m coming,” He said before getting up, following them to the living room where Jackson had put their plates. 

Jackson let Bambam down and Bambam leaned over, scraping up one of his cats into his lap as he began to eat his chicken nuggets. 

Mark tucked Bambam into his bed, picking up the stray crayons and coloring books that were littering his room before turning off his light. 

The closed the door, heading into the living room. 

“Are you planning to stay for a while?” Mark asked, his hands tucked into his hoodie and Jackson shook his head. 

“If it gets late like this, I normally let him sleep. He will text me in the morning if he’s still dropped,” Jackson explained and Mark nodded, grabbing his phone from the coffee table. 

They went downstairs, getting into Jackson’s car and Mark fiddled with the heat knob. 

“So how long were you eavesdropping?” Mark asked as Jackson pulled out of Bambam’s parking lot. 

“Not that long, I was coming to tell you dinner was ready, I didn’t mean to hear any of it.” 

“I heard something interesting,” Mark said and Jackson shook his head. 

“He took that out of context. I told him that no one could touch his prince parts, he said only me and I went along with it because I knew that I wouldn’t,” Jackson explained and Mark laughed.

“Not that, although, I could hear you panicking behind us when he said that. No, he knows that I love you and that you love me,” Mark said and Jackson turned on his turn signal. 

“Yeah, older bam is under there somewhere, everyone knows that we love each other,” Jackson said and Mark swatted at him. 

“No, I mean- like parents, he wants us to be his parents,” Mark said and Jackson nodded. 

“How do you feel about that?” Jackson asked and Mark shrugged. 

“We damn near raised him back then, what’s the difference between then and now?” Mark asked and Jackson made a face. 

“Now Yugyeom makes his prince parts tingle,” Jackson said offhandedly and Mark hit him again. 

“Shut up.”

“Do you love me more than you love him?” Mark asked him seriously and Jackson stopped at a red light.

“One hundred percent,” Jackson said, no hesitation. 

“Then you can do this, you can be his caregiver,” Mark said and the light turned green. 

“What about you, are you going to be his caregiver too?” Jackson asked and Mark was just silent.

It took Mark a while to finally agree to the arrangement, though but he did eventually agree to help Jackson with Bambam. It was a strange arrangement, and Jackson respected that Mark was honest about it, and the insecurities that he felt doing it. Mark still had to catch up though, and figure out the perfect mix of softness and sternness that Bambam craved from the relationship. But, he was getting better at it, and that was all Jackson asked of him. 

There was something that they hadn’t anticipated when they got into the arrangement, what would happen when their schedules started up. 

Jackson looked up from his schedule, his hands rubbing his temple in an effort to get rid of the headache that was already starting to form behind his eyes. 

He would have to fly to China tomorrow to start some promotions and guest appearances on a couple of shows, then fly back for their album recording and impending dance practices. 

“Daddy,” Jackson heard and he turned his head quickly to see Bambam standing at the edge of the table, his arms hidden behind his back. 

“Are you busy?” Bambam asked and Jackson raised his eyebrow. 

“What are you doing Prince?” He asked and Bambam shrugged.

“Where’s Daddy Mark?” Jackson asked and Bambam pointed towards the bedroom. 

“He’s sleeping, he sleeps a lot, a lot more than you do,” He pointed out and Jackson nodded, waving the little towards him. 

“Are you okay daddy?” Bambam asked, crawling into his lap, and Jackson resituated him, pushing the schedule away. 

As much as this was a therapeutic thing for Bambam, Jackson felt the same way about it. It was relaxing because it gave his brain something to focus on when it was running at 170 miles per hour and thinking about any and everything that was passing through it. 

“What are you thinking about?” Bambam asked and Jackson sighed.

“Just schedules, we’re going to have to start doing big boy things again, we won’t get to just stay home and play anymore,” Jackson explained gingerly and Bambam nodded. 

“I know, we have two weeks until we start,” Bambam said joyfully and Jackson shook his head. 

“Daddy has to leave tomorrow, he’s going to go in an airplane and have to stay the night,” Jackson explained and Bambam nodded. 

“When do we come back?” 

“Not we, you have to stay here, but you can call Daddy whenever you want, and you’ll have Daddy mark to take care of you while I’m gone,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded.

“Okay, just- take care of yourself, Daddy,” Bambam said softly and Jackson hugged him tightly, unwilling to let him go.

“Hi Daddy,” Bambam said, waving into the camera as he sat on his bed. He was holding Cupcake on his lap, and his pacifier was clipped to his shirt, dangling from the side of his mouth. 

“Hi prince,” Jackson cleared his throat. “Is Daddy there with you?” 

“No, I’m by myself, so Cupcake is giving me cuddles to keep me comfort,” he answered. 

“When did you drop?”

“Just a little bit ago, I was feeling little so I got in my coziest pajamas and called Daddy,” he explained softly. 

“What are you doing tonight?” 

“Gyeomies going to come over and give me cuddles.” 

“Prince,” Jackson warned and Bambam sighed. 

“I’m not going to let him give me cummies, don’t worry,” Bambam said and Jackson coughed, covering his mouth.

“Are you getting sick? You can’t get sick Daddy, you have to take care of yourself,” Bambam complained and Jackson nodded. 

“I am taking care of myself, I promise,” Jackson said and Bambam gave him a soft sigh. 

“You better, because you can’t be sick, I don’t like it when you’re sick,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded with a laugh. 

“I don’t like it when I’m sick either,” Jackson said and Bambam shifted in bed, letting go of his cat to get close to the camera. 

“I don’t like it when you’re not here either, I want you to come home,” Bambam whispered, as if it were a secret and Jackson had the decency to indulge him by leaning forward and whispering back. 

“I want to come home too. I don’t like being away from you and Mark either,” He divulged and Bambam smiled. 

“Really?” He asked quietly. 

“Really,” Jackson affirmed and Bambam stretched across the bed. 

“I love you.”

“I love you too Prince.”

Jackson stopped in the stairwell, hearing the tense voices coming from below. Today was the second day of practice and the excitement of the process was starting to wear off, leaving the restless irritation in its wake.

“How can you just sit back and let him do that to you?” Jinyoung asked and Jackson crept down the stairs softly. 

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, it’s not what you think Jinyoung,” Mark begged and Jinyoung scoffed. 

“I saw them kiss. I heard Bambam call him Daddy, they’ve only gotten closer since then, Bambam called him every night while he was in China, why are you turning your head at the evidence-- you know about it, you know about it and you don’t care?” Jinyoung accused. 

“I know that it’s a lot different than you think Jinyoung, we’re all on the same page,” Mark defended. 

“You’re with them too? I don’t, Yugyeom’s not on the same page as you guys, did you forget that he had a boyfriend, a boyfriend who’s our family or are you that disgusting?” Jinyoung stated and Jackson ran down the stairs, unable to listen any longer. 

“Hey, leave him alone,” Jackson interrupted and Mark shoved out a sigh. 

“I’m going to get some water,” He hissed before pushing through the backdoor, heading to cool off. 

Jackson knew that following him wasn’t going to help, so he stayed with Jinyoung. 

‘Leave him alone, Jinyoung. You don’t know what you’re talking about and I’m sick and fucking tired of you talking like you know what’s going on,” Jackson yelled and Jinyoung scoffed, stepping forward. 

Jinyoung was no shrinking violet, and he wasn’t about to step back from a confrontation. 

“Of fucking course I don’t know what’s going on! Because you don’t fucking tell me anything!” 

“Because it’s none of your business,”

“It became my fucking business when I had to comfort Yugyeom who was fucking sobbing because he thinks that his boyfriend is sleeping with his bandmate. He’s so upset and insecure, and you, Mark, and Bambam are flaunting around your weird relationship without a fucking care to anyone else,” Jinyoung vented.

“You’re talking to Mark, and you’re talking to Yugyeom, but have you thought to actually ask me?” 

“I did ask you! I asked you and you lied in my face. You told me nothing was happening. I told you to stop, and you didn’t. We used to tell each other everything, you were my best friend,” 

“It’s not what you think-” 

“I saw you kiss in the kitchen!” Jinyoung yelled and Jackson clapped a hand over Jinyoung’s mouth. 

“You don’t know what you saw,” Jackson hissed. 

“Hey, what’s going on?” Jaebum walked over to them, and Jackson dropped his hands from Jinyoung’s mouth. 

“Nothing,” Jinyoung said, his jaw clenched and Jaebum looked between the two of them, his jaw jutting out slightly. 

“What did you do? Jaebum asked Jackson. 

“Nothing, come on, let’s go,” Jinyoung insisted, turning his back on Jackson, and he couldn’t help but feel like there was a finality to it. 

Jackson followed to the dance studio, trying to shake the feeling. 

There was nothing wrong with what they were doing, and it was none of the other member’s business.

Right?


	8. Embarrassment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jackson has a confusing dream and causes more problems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long break between chapters.

Jackson dropped down on his bed, groaning as his face hit the pillow.

“Jinyoung’s completely blowing this out of proportion, he doesn’t understand, he doesn’t get that I’m helping him,” Jackson complained and Mark sighed, sitting on the bed next to him. 

“I know you’re helping him. Jinyoung is just being nosy,” Mark affirmed, rubbing Jackson’s back. Jackson turned onto his back, looking up at his boyfriend. 

“You’re really good for him, good to him,” Mark said and Jackson leaned up. 

“I’m good to you too,” Jackson said, kissing Mark.

“Are you,” Mark asked as he pulled away from Jackson.

“Very much so,” Jackson said, wrapping his arms around Mark’s shoulders and pulling the elder man against him. 

Mark pushed at Jackson’s shirt and Jackson lifted his shirt, throwing it across the room before pawing at Mark’s shirt as he pulled him against him. 

They pushed their hips against each other, and Mark slipped his hands into the back of Jackson’s pants, pushing his hips harder against him. 

“Daddy,” He groaned and the feeling ran through Jackson from his head to toe.

“You like it?” Jackson asked and Mark pushed Jackson’s pants down his hips. 

“I want- I want you in me,” He whispered and Jackson unbuttoned his pants, kicking them off before standing over Mark. 

Mark was laying on his stomach, his hips propped up on a pillow and Jackson kissed down his back, running his hands over his muscles. 

“Come on,” Mark said, wiggling his hips and Jackson smiled, climbing on top of Mark.

“Daddy,” He heard and he looked back to see Bambam standing at the door. 

“Prince,” Jackson greeted, rolling off of Mark, who climbed up, laying his head on Jackson’s chest, stroking over his abs and down to his hip bones. 

“Are you and baba mark playing without me?” Bambam asked and Jackson nodded. 

“Well that’s no fair,” Bambam complained. 

“How about we have our little baby join us, wouldn’t you like that?” Mark asked and Bambam pouted cutely. 

“Please?” Bambam asked and Jackson nodded dumbly, watching as the boy climbed on the bed with them. 

Bambam climbed on top of Jackson, kissing over his neck, moving farther down his chest as he planted his hips over Jacksons’.

“Daddy,” Bambam groaned and Jackson’s hips stuttered. 

“Say it again,” He whispered. 

“Daddy, please,” Bambam begged and Mark bit his earlobes.

“Please what baby,” Mark whispered. 

“Please give me cummies, daddy, I’ve been a good boy,” Bambam whimpered.

“Give it to him Daddy,” Mark whispered in his ear.

Jackson woke up, startling himself out of sleep. 

“What’s wrong?” Mark asked, and Jackson looked over at the clock, before looking at Mark. 

“Did you have a nightmare? Are you okay?” Mark asked, sitting up and pushing Jackson’s hair out of his face. 

“You’re sweating, you’re not sick are you?” He asked and Jackson shook his head. 

“How long have I been asleep?” He asked and Mark looked at the clock. 

It was nearing four in the morning.

“An hour maybe,” He said and before pushing Jackson’s hair out of his face again. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Mark asked and Jackson nodded, pressing his lips against Mark’s. 

“Whoa, where did that come from?” Mark said, pulling away and Jackson ran his hands up Mark’s arms. 

“Please,” He whispered and Mark nodded, letting Jackson kiss him. 

Jackson walked into the practice room, rubbing his hands over his face. 

He didn’t get a lot of sleep from last night, and there was still this weird silence between him and Jinyoung. 

He was sure Jinyoung had something to Jaebum as well because he was always talking to Jaebum. Jaebum had been giving him evil looks all morning anyway.

There had been a clear tension in the room, and even members who were not involved, Youngjae, could tell something was up.

“Hyung,” Bambam said, throwing his arms around Jackson’s shoulders. Jackson brushed the kid off of him, who stumbled and pouted. 

Jackson just moved across the room, stretching in the corner. 

The day continued to go on like that, with Bambam growing increasingly frustrated every time Jackson brushed him off. 

Jackson couldn’t help it though. 

Jinyoung kept making angry noises and faces any time Bambam touched him, and after last night’s dream, Jackson didn’t know what to think. 

It wasn’t the first time he’d had a sexual dream, and it definitely wasn’t the first time he’d a dream about his fellow members. 

He recalled vividly a dream featuring Jaebum, Jinyoung, a rice paddle, and spray cheese, it was weird. 

But that was early on when they first got in the band together, and he was seeing them every day, he was a horny teenager, and he was incredibly pent up because even though he and Mark were something, they weren’t _ something _ just yet. 

But this, this was different. 

He was twenty-four now, he was way past his awkward teen years of trying to figure out what he liked, and who he liked, and how he liked it. 

Instead, he was having those kinds of dreams about Bambam, and how gross did that make him?

Jinyoung was right about him.

“Jackson,” Bambam said, and Jackson sighed. 

“that’s hyung brat,” Jackson said and Bambam frowned. 

“Baba,” Bambam whispered, pulling on Jackson’s sleeve.

Jackson shook him off. 

“Daddy,” He whimpered and Jackson looked down at him.

“Are you serious right now? You can’t be little right now, we’ve got shit to do,” Jackson hissed at Bambam who recoiled away from Jackson.

“Sorry,” Bambam whispered before wrapping his arms around himself, walking away from Jackson.

Jackson groaned, pushing his hands through his hair as he watched Yugyeom try to console Bambam, only to get pushed away. 

They weren’t really making their case. 

The rest of the practice was not any better, Bambam transitioning from angry to sad as he tried not to drop. Jackson could tell that the younger male was fighting his headspace and that fighting the drop was only making it worse.

He wanted to help him, he did, but he couldn’t get that stupid dream out of his head, and those stupid accusatory looks from Jinyoung was still following him. 

He just wanted the day to be over.

“Alright, let’s go home,” Jaebum called and Jackson looked up from his perch on the floor. He was sitting in the corner, watching the rest of the band. Jinyoung had a neutral face on, now masking his anger to a more bored look. It was as if Jinyoung were bored with Jackson and that hurt a lot more than his anger, but what was he going to do. 

He just wanted to go to bed and sleep and forget about all of the stupid thoughts in his head. 

“Hey, Yugyeom,” Mark called and Jackson frowned, looking over at his boyfriend. 

“Huh?”

“Would you take me home today?” He asked.

“You’re not coming home with me tonight?” Jackson asked.

“No, I just want to sleep in my own bed tonight,” Mark said and Yugyeom whined. 

“Can’t you ride home with Jinyoung? I was planning to go to Bammies tonight.”

“No,” Bambam complained and Yugyeom looked over at Bambam with a weird look. 

“It’s uh- It’s dirty,” Bambam said before looking down at Jackson pleadingly. 

“I don’t care if it’s dirty,” Yugyeom enthused and Mark groaned. 

“Yugyeom, come on, just take hyung home,” Mark complained and Yugyeom sighed.

“Fine,” Yugyeom complained before getting up. 

Jackson got up too, grabbing Mark’s arm.

“Why aren’t you coming home with me?” Jackson asked softly. 

“Because you need to fix what’s going on with Bambam, he needs his Daddy,” Mark said, looking around the room.

“You’re his daddy too,” Jackson protested and Mark set him with a look. 

“But you know it’s not me who he wants nor needs, fix it,” Mark said before wrapping his arms around Yugyeom’s shoulders. 

“Come on Yugy!” Mark said with a faux cuteness and Yugyeom turned red, trying to push the elder away.

“Why is everyone being so weird today?” Youngjae asked before shrugging. 

“Whatever, I’m going home, have fun losers,” He said leaving the room first. 

“Come on hyung,” Yugyeom said, leaving with Mark hanging off of him.

All that was left were Jinyoung, Jackson, Jaebum and Bambam. 

“Bam, how are you getting home?” Jaebum asked and Bambam looked up at Jackson with wide eyes, his hand hesitating near his chin, as if he wanted to put his thumb in his mouth, but was afraid to. 

“I can take you,” Jackson offered and Jinyoung scoffed.

“Of course you can,” Jinyoung said before looking over at Jaebum. 

“Hyung, let’s go,” Jinyoung said with a tilt of an eyebrow before leaving the room, leaving Bambam and Jackson by themselves. 

“You ready to go?” Jackson asked him awkwardly and Bambam nodded, biting his lip. 

“Yes Dad- hyung,” Bambam corrected before standing up, grabbing his bag. 

He shifted back and forth and Jackson rolled his eyes before waving him on. 

“Hurry up,” Jackson said and Bambam nodded, following after him. 

They rode in silence, Bambam squirming the whole way there. 

Jackson could only look at him from the corner of his eyes, and it was annoying him that he was feeling this way.

“Quit,” Jackson said and Bambam bit his lips, stopping his movement by chewing his lips and tapping his fingers. He’d forget that he was supposed to stop, fidgeting again before stopping again then restarting. 

“Bam,” Jackson reminded him and Bambam froze suddenly.

“I’m sorry,” Bambam chanted and Jackson stopped the car, realizing they were outside of Bambam’s house.

“What’s- what’s wrong,” Jackson asked turning on his car light to see that Bambam had been sitting rigidly, his fists clenched by his side, his chin tucked into his chest. 

He was still chanting sorry, his chin wet with tears, and his voice small, the words blurring together, changing to Thai. 

“Why-” Jackson started, before his eyes trailed down to Bambam’s lap that was growing darker.

“I didn’t- I didn’t mean- I just wanted to be a good boy,” Bambam sobbed out and Jackson sighed.

“Come on, it’s okay Prince, let’s go upstairs,” Jackson said, reaching into the back seat to grab a jacket. He got out of the car, walking around the car to Bambam's side.

He opened the door, unbuckling the seat belt before pulling the little out of the seat. He wrapped the jacket around Bambam's waist before pulling Bambam into a tight hug.

"I'm sorry Da- hyung, " Bambam whimpered and Jackson pushed his hand through Bambam's hair.

Jackson led Bambam up to his apartment, shielding him from noisy eyes before directing him to the bathroom.

"Go shower," Jackson said and Bambam nodded, heading to the bathroom slowly.

Jackson made himself comfortable on the foot of Bambam’s bed, toying with his phone. 

He’d have to get his car cleaned tomorrow, but there were more important things to worry about than that. 

Bambam had never done that before, never wet himself, or sobbed like that at Jackson, and he didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do, so he did nothing, which wasn’t like him. 

Jackson wasn’t the one to ever chose inaction, he was a headlong kind of guy, which is kind of what got him into this position in the first place, so to sit and do nothing felt unnatural. 

He felt like he was paralyzed. 

Jackson heard the bathroom door open and he stood before sitting back down again before finally deciding to stand. 

“You’re still here?” Bambam asked, his voice soft and sad and Jackson sat down because what else was he supposed to do.

“Of course,” Jackson answered and Bambam looked down, toying with the bottom of his shirt.

He was just wearing a pair of briefs and a shirt that belonged to Yugyeom, and obviously, it was to make himself feel more comfortable after everything that happened today. 

“I just- I just wanted to be a good boy,” Bambam whispered and Jackson made an aborted attempt to reach out for the shy little.

Of course, he didn’t come to him, because why would he. 

Jackson’s been an asshole all day. 

“Are you little right now Prince?” He asked and Bambam rubbed at his hair aggressively.

“I tried, I tried to be big bam, but I couldn’t and Daddy hates me- I just want to be good,” Bambam whimpered and it broke Jackson’s heart to see him like that. 

“You are a good boy, a very good boy, it’s not your fault, and I don’t hate you, I’m sorry I’ve been so mean,” Jackson apologized and Bambam took a deep breath, controlling his shuddering sobs. 

“I can be better, so I won’t make Daddy mad anymore,” He whispered and Jackson furrowed his eyebrows.

What was he talking about?

Bambam walked up to Jackson, slinging one of his long legs over Jackson’s knees, placing himself in Jackson’s lap. 

“What are you talking about?” Jackson asked and Bambam leaned forward, his head tucked in Jackson’s neck as he swirled his hips against Jackson’s. 

“What are you doing,” Jackson asked, trying to still the little’s hesitant hips.

“I just want to be good, let me be good for you,” he pled and Jackson threw his head back, letting out a sigh.

He didn’t need this right now. Not after everything today. 

“Baby, look at daddy, look at me,” He said and Bambam brought his face up, his lips attaching to Jackson’s jawline. 

He knew there was more he could do to stop the boy, more he _ should _ do to stop him, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. 

Not because he was interested in Bambam in the least bit, but because of the fear. 

He feared what rejecting Bambam in such a fragile moment would do to him. 

He’d already pushed him away in what was an obvious time of need, the boy couldn’t take anything else.

“Prince, look at Daddy,” Jackson said more firmly and Bambam finally looked up at him. 

“Is it not good, am I not good?” He asked and Jackson sighed, cupping Bambam’s face in his hands. 

“You are good, you are so good, you don’t have to do any of this,” Jackson said and Bambam shook his head. 

“Nuh-uh. Daddy Mark told me daddy had a naughty dream about noo, and that’s why he’s been so mean. If this is what daddy wants from noo, noo can do it,” He explained and Jackson bit his lip. 

Why the hell did Mark tell Bambam about that?

Wait, how Mark find out about the dream?

“But is that what Prince wants?” Jackson asked and Bambam shrugged with one shoulder, one of his hands coming to tug frantically at his hair. 

Jackson pulled his hand away, kissing his fist gently.

“It doesn’t matter what prince wants, as long as Daddy isn’t mad anymore, Prince will do anything Daddy wants,” Bambam spoke and Jackson shook his head. 

“What about Yugyeom,” Jackson asked and Bambam’s hand went back to tug at that part of his hair again before Jackson removed it. 

“Then we won’t tell Gweomy, this is a Daddy and noo secret.”

Jackson tsked, he knew that wasn’t what Bambam wanted and no matter how vulnerable he was feeling in the space right now; when he woke up the next morning, he would regret it.

“That’s not what daddy wants, I don’t want-”

“Me? You don’t want me anymore? I promise, noo can make it better, noo will do whatever daddy wants, please don’t-” Bambam said, his voice high and his hands frantic as they pulled at Jackson’s shirt, tried to undress him.

Jackson wrapped his arms around Bambam’s body, trapping his hands to his chest. 

He pulled the boy into a tight hug and Bambam thrashed for a bit before finally letting out a harsh sob, collapsing in Jackson’s hug.

“Daddy wants you, daddy just doesn’t want _ that _ from you. I’m sorry I was so mean,” Jackson apologized again and Bambam just cried into his chest, whimpering that he’d be a good boy, and for his daddy not to leave him.

Jackson brushed his hands through Bambam’s hair as the boy woke up slightly, his eyes puffy from sleep. 

He’d cried himself to sleep, no doubt the exhaustion from the day aiding him. 

It’d only been about an hour and a half since the boy had fallen asleep, Jackson having resituating them so that they were laying together. 

He didn’t know why he was so stressed out about that dream. He didn’t go into a week-long spiral about his Jinyoung and Jaebum dream, it shouldn’t matter now with Bambam. 

He loved where he was with Mark, and what he had with Bambam too. 

He liked taking care of him, and that dream was obviously a fluke. 

He was overreacting over nothing.

“You stayed?” Bambam murmured, his voice hoarse and Jackson shifted on the bed to look at him. 

“You little?” He asked and Bambam shook his head, flipping onto his stomach and hiking his leg up to get more comfortable. 

“Nope, I’m coming up,” He said before his face contorted. 

“Oh my god, I can’t believe I pissed myself,” Bambam whined, hiding his face in his pillow. 

“Do we need to get you some pull-ups?” He asked and Bambam rolled his eyes. 

“Fuck off,” He complained, adjusting his head on the pillow. 

Jackson didn’t pull his hands from Bambam’s hair, not wanting to make Bambam think he was disgusted with him. 

“I’m uh sorry about your car, I’ll pay to have it cleaned,” Bambam offered. 

“Don’t worry about it, what was that about anyway?” He asked and Bambam paused, burying his face in the pillow. 

“I uh- I didn’t want to make daddy- uh you madder. I had to pee, but you told me to hurry up, and I was afraid to ask, cause I didn’t want you to wait on me,” Bambam said, this time quieter, clearly embarrassed. 

“I’m- I’ve been a shit caregiver, I didn’t- I didn’t mean for you to feel like your headspace is a burden,” Jackson said and Bambam shook his head turning on his back.

“I really don’t want to have sex with you hyung, I’m sorry like I thought I could do it to keep you as a--you know daddy or whatever, but I really don’t want that,” Bambam confessed and Jackson laughed.

“The feeling is completely mutual, I don’t- I don’t want to fuck you at all,” Jackson said and bambam looked over at him, poking Jackson in the ribs. 

“But Mark hyung said you were moaning prince in your sleep,” Bambam teased and Jackson rolled his eyes. 

“That’s of course what he heard, he doesn’t know the entire dream,” Jackson said and Bambam turned on his side, propping his head on his hand. 

“ooh, spill,” 

“I’m not telling you what I dreamt.”

“You have to, I was in it,” Bambam complained and Jackson huffed, covering his eyes. 

“It started weird, we were talking about my argument with Jinyoung and then I was- you know, in bed with Mark, and we were, you know, and Mark called me Daddy, and it… but then you opened the door, calling me Daddy, as you do in little space, and asked if we were playing without you. Mark invited you to bed and you asked me to give you cummies and Mark told me to do it,” Jackson admitted and Bambam hooted. 

“That was hot, no wonder you’ve been avoiding me all day,” He said and Jackson plucked him in the forehead. 

“I fucking hate you,” 

“No, clearly you want to give me cummies,” Bambam teased and Jackson screwed up his face. 

“Seriously, where did you even hear that word from?” He asked and Bambam shrugged. 

“You’ll never find out,” Bambam said and Jackson rolled his eyes. 

“Why is Jinyoung mad at you?” He asked and Jackson sighed. 

“It’s long and complicated,” He said and Bambam sighed. 

“Do you- should we tell everyone else, about what’s going on?” Bambam asked and Jackson looked over at him.

“What?”

“I just- you and Mark took it well, and everything feels all weird and segmented, and maybe if you didn’t have to keep my secret, your mind wouldn’t make it so gross. I don’t know, maybe it’s stupid, but it’s hard having to lie to everyone,” Bambam said and Jackson shrugged. 

“If it’s what you want,” He offered and Bambam nodded. 

“Maybe, just, I don’t know, not yet I guess, but I do, eventually,” He said and Jackson nodded. 

“Okay, whenever you’re ready, I’m ready,” He said and Bambam nodded before turning back over. 

“It’s only three, why didn’t we save all of this sentimental shit for seven, god,” Bambam complained and Jackson laughed, pulling the blanket back up over them.

“Shut the hell up and go to sleep,” Jackson said goodnaturedly, glad that they had cleared the air between them.


	9. Coming Clean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Due to unforeseen circumstances, Bambam tells the group his little secret.

Jackson leaned against the wall, watching the younger man in front of him. Bambam was pulling at his hair with one hand, his other hand near his mouth as he sucked on his thumb. 

He’d been dropped since this morning, and even though they had schedules, Bambam just couldn’t make it through. 

Jackson had offered to take him home, since they were recording vocals, and it was something the two rappers could come back and record later on by themselves. 

Of course, Jinyoung had given him an evil look. 

Jinyoung was obviously still mad at him, and Jackson just shouldered it, because what else could he do? 

“Bam-ah, calm down, it’s okay,” Jackson tried to soothe, but he wasn't having any of it. 

He had been irritable all morning, and recluse, and a lot like the Bambam that he’d started to notice before he knew about his secret. He didn’t know why he was fighting the drop so hard, nor why he was dropping so hard in the first place. 

“Sit down, come on,” Jackson goaded, leading Bambam onto his bed. Bambam fought the transition, trying his hardest not to sit down. 

Jackson manhandled him into his lap, pressing the boy into his chest. 

“What’s wrong?” Jackson asked, finally pinning the boy down and Bambam melted into him. 

“I need-” Bambam gasped out and Jackson smoothed down the shorter boy’s hair, letting him wrap his legs around his waist. 

“Come on, tell Daddy what you need, he can’t make it better if you don’t tell him what you need.”

“I need you,” He whimpered and Jackson shushed him. 

“You have me already prince, you know that," Jackson said, hugging him tightly through his small tantrum.

"Do you want Daddy to give you kisses?” He asked before peppering kisses all over Bambam’s face. 

Bambam giggled, leaning his head against Jackson’s. 

“No kisses daddy,” He cooed. 

“Well then do you want a spanking?” Jackson teased and Bambam wrinkled up his nose, shaking his head cutely. 

“No spankies, just kisses,” Bambam said and Jackson kissed the younger’s arms and fingertips. 

“No, not kisses there,” Bambam pouted. 

“Where do you want daddy to kiss you then?” Jackson asked, standing and dropping Bambam onto the bed. 

He bounced with a giggle and Jackson smiled, just happy to see that Bambam wasn’t breaking down anymore. 

They’d have to talk about why the boy had the breakdown, and how they couldn’t leave group activities every time Bambam didn’t feel up to it, but he knew that this space was supposed to help him manage his stress, and Bambam must have been under more stress than they thought.

Bambam shrugged playfully.

“You know, do you want daddy to give you kisses here?” He asked, tickling his feet and Bambam shook his head. 

“No, what about here?” He asked, kissing over his knees. 

“Not my knees,” Bambam giggled and Jackson kissed over his thighs. 

“How about here?” He asked and Bambam shook his head.

“Higher.”

Jackson lifted his shirt, kissing over his skinny stomach. 

It was scary how much of Bambam’s ribs he could see. 

The boy had always been skinny, but it worried Jackson any time a member got this skinny. 

He’d have to start rewarding Bambam for eating. 

“Here?” He asked and Bambam squirmed. 

“Daddy, it tickles,” He gasped out and Jackson moved on to kiss at his shoulder bones.

The skin over it was pressed tight and Jackson couldn’t help lingering there.

“Not- not there,” Bambam whispered, his hands coming up to shield his bony shoulder and Jackson sighed. 

Even in little space, Bambam could acknowledge that he was going too far.

“How about on your cheeks?” He asked, kissing Bambam’s once puffy cheeks and Bambam turned red. 

“No Daddy, on my lips,” Bambam complained before swooping forward and pressing his lips into Jackson’s. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Jackson heard the door slam against the wall behind them and Bambam jumped, hiding behind Jackson. 

“Daddy,” He whimpered, his voice smaller as he dropped forward. 

“Yugyeom- what are you doing here?” He asked and Yugyeom dropped the bag he had been holding. 

“I came to check on Bambam, and I find him all fucking cuddled up with you, calling you daddy? What kind of sick shit-” Yugyeom exploded and Bambam flinched. 

“No Yugy, no. Noo didn’t me-” Bambam started and Jackson pulled away from Bambam, getting off of the bed.

“Get out Yugyeom,” He said, pushing the boy. 

“What? No! Fuck you,” Yugyeom swore, swinging and Jackson ducked it, planting his shoulder into Yugyeom’s sternum and pushing him from the room.

They crashed into a hallway wall and Jackson did his best to avoid Yugyeom’s punches.

“Get the fuck out of here now!” Jackson yelled as he finally pushed Yugyeom to the ground. 

“Hyung- you can’t-” Yugyeom said, his voice finally breaking and Jackson knew that he should say something, that he should stop the boy in his tracks before he misunderstood any further but he could hear Bambam sobbing in the bedroom, absolutely falling apart and he knew who he would comfort more. 

“Go back to the dorm!” Jackson yelled and Yugyeom got up, clenching his jaw as he left the apartment defeated. 

“Yugy he-” Bambam began to hyperventilate, his words being a blurred mix of Korean, Thai, and English before dropping completely into Thai. 

Jackson shushed him, rocking him. 

“No, it’s fine, it’s fine, calm down, you’re going to make yourself sick, calm down,” Jackson said and Bambam just sobbed miserably into his shoulder.

Jackson’s phone rang about five minutes after Yugyeom left and Jackson ignored it, turning the ringer down when it buzzed back to life immediately afterward. 

He should have answered, but he didn’t know if he could. 

Bambam’s secret was out, and he didn’t know what to do. 

Bambam’s eyes opened softly, rubbing at them. He’d passed out about thirty minutes into his crying fit, and now two hours later was waking. 

He had at least thirty missed calls, and four not very nice voicemails from Jinyoung. 

He was surprised that Jinyoung and Jaebum hadn’t come to the apartment to drag them out. 

“Hey prince,” Jackson whispered and Bambam tucked his head into his pillow. 

“Everyone knows now and they’re going to think I’m weird,” Bambam whispered and Jackson pushed his hands through Bambam’s hair. 

“Are you up?” Jackson asked and Bambam shrugged. 

“A little, but I want to be little again,” Bambam whispered and Jackson hugged him to his chest. 

“He’s going to hate me, they’re all going to hate me,” Bambam whimpered and Jackson rocked him vigorously.

“They are confused and concerned, and they are thinking some things that aren’t true, but they don’t hate you Bam-ah,” Jackson tried to console him. 

“They think we’re fucking, can you imagine how much worse it’ll be when I tell them I’m calling you daddy, not because you’re making me suck your cock, but because you’re letting me suck a paci? That’s fucking weird,” Bambam bit out and Jackson gave him a warning swat on his bottom. 

“Language, I know you’re upset, but we don’t use those words,” Jackson admonished and he could feel Bambam let out a breath against his chest.

That semblance of control must have been relieving for him. 

“We should go to see the rest of the hyungs,” Bambam whispered softly and Jackson nodded. 

“Are you sure prince, we don’t have to talk to them just yet, we can just take care of you tonight,” Jackson reassured him and Bambam shook his head. 

“No, I want to tell them now,” Bambam said and Jackson nodded. 

They arrived at the dorm and Jackson took a deep breath, letting Bambam clutch onto him. 

The little had been talkative during the car ride, but now that they were at the door, he had become shy and quiet. 

The door slid open and Jackson smiled as he saw Mark.

Mark’s stony face made him drop his smile. 

_ “Yugyeom’s really upset, he said that you two were fucking when he got there _ ,” Mark hissed in Mandarin and Jackson shook his head. 

_ “No, it was just- he’d had a really big drop, and Yugyeom saw us kiss and misread everything _ ,” Jackson said and Mark nodded, letting out a deep breath. 

“Everyone’s here, they’ve been trying to console Yugyeom since he got-” 

“You two have got some nerve, showing up here,” Jinyoung said and Mark turned quickly to see Jinyoung in the hallway. 

“Jinyoungie-” Mark started and Jiinyoung shot him down with a glare. 

“I see you’re still in on it. I warned you, I warned all of you what would happen, and you didn’t give a fuck! Was it worth it? Was a piece of ass worth the band,” Jinyoung asked, his voice full of venom. 

“It’s not- that’s not what-” Bambam said, starting to hyperventilate and Jackson grabbed his hand, squeezing it tight. 

“You’re wrong Jinyoung if you give us a chance to explain,” Jackson started and Jinyoung scoffed. 

“You had your chance, in that hallway, remember? I asked you so many times, and you lied to me, to the band, you don’t get another chance,” Jinyoung said. 

“Let them in,” They heard and their attention was turned to the person standing at the mouth of the hall. 

“Gyeomy,” Bambam breathed out and Yugyeom turned his head. 

“Don’t- don’t call me that, just- just come in,” Yugyeom said before walking towards the kitchen. 

Bambam deflated next to Jackson, his hand slipping out of Jackson’s as he reached up and pulled at his hair.

Jackson released his hand from his hair before leading the boy past Jinyoung and into the living room. 

Everyone was seated in the living room and Bambam took a step back, pulling at his hair again.

He was going to bolt. 

“It’s okay Prince, you don’t have to if you don’t want to,” Jackson whispered to him and Bambam closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

“I’m not- I’m not having sex with Jackson, I’m a little,” Bambam blurted out.

“You’re a what?” Jaebum asked when it seemed like everyone else in the room wasn’t going to ask. 

“I’m a little,” Bambam said and Jackson cleared his throat. 

He could see the look of disbelief in some of their eyes. 

“He’s uh- he’s been really stressed out lately, and so has turned to this as a certain way to cope,” Jackson explained and Jinyoung cleared his throat. 

“If you were just going to lie to us, what was the point of even coming here?” Jinyoung asked and Bambam looked up at Jackson, panicked. 

“It’s not a lie! It’s not!” Bambam said, stomping his foot. 

“Prince,” Jackson warned softly and Bambam shook his head. 

“I told you they wouldn’t believe noo, they think noo’s lying,” Bambam whimpered and Jackson sighed. 

He was trying to avoid this, a full drop in front of the group.

“No one thinks you’re lying, it’s okay,” Jackson said and Jaebum tilted his head.

“Bam-ah,” He whispered and Bambam looked up at their leader. 

“Baba, tell them, tell them noo’s not lying,” Bambam whispered.

“Baba, Jackson’s your baba, baby boy?” Jaebum asked and Bambam shook his head. 

“Not baby boy, prince,” He whispered and Jaebum nodded. 

“Prince, sorry, Jackson’s your baba?” He asked and Bambam nodded. 

“Baba takes care of me, makes me chicken nuggets, and gives me stickers when I follow the rules. We play really fun games, but not the game that me and Yugyeom play, because no one’s supposed to give me cummies when I’m little, even though I like it when Gyeomie does it, and I let him sometimes even if baba tells me I can’t,” Bambam blurted and Yugyeom’s face turned red. 

“Oh my god-” Yugyeom said and Jaebum frowned. 

“Cummies?” He asked and Bambam nodded. 

“It’s when gyeomy touches my prince parts and-”

“Prince, please,” Jackson cut him off and Bambam pouted before sighing. 

“Fine,” he said, crossing his arms. 

“This is really fucking weird,” Youngjae said and Bambam turned his eyes to Youngjae before frowning.

“No, not weird, different, it’s different. When you get overwhelmed you have your ways of blowing off steam, this is just Bambam’s way. And he’s not hurting himself, or anyone else, so we shouldn’t- we shouldn’t judge him,” Jaebum said and Jackson stared at his leader, surprised. 

He never thought it would be Jaebum to be the one to understand. 

“But I saw you two, you were telling him to kiss you in places, intimate places,” Yugyeom combatted and Bambam shook his head. 

“Baba gives me kisses when I’m good, I like kisses. You give me kisses too, only they’re a lot different than Daddy’s kisses, and your kisses make my p-”

“I swear if you finish that sentence,” Jackson said and Bambam rolled his eyes. 

“You’re being no fun daddy, tell him baba Mark,” Bambam goaded and Jinyoung gasped.

“Baba Mark?” He asked. 

“Yeah, I tried to tell you, it wasn’t the way we thought. When I found out, remember. I told you nothing was happening like that between Bambam and Jackson. I started to help take care of him when Jackson was spreading himself too thin between the two of us. Jackson and I are very much only in love with each other,” Mark said and Yugyeom pushed past Jinyoung to grab Bambam’s hand. 

“What about us?” He asked and Jackson watched as Bambam sobered up. 

“I love you and you only,” Bambam whispered and Yugyeom pulled him close to his chest, hugging him. 

Yugyeom’s shoulders shook with tears as he held Bambam tightly. 

It reminded Jackson of when they had pranked Yugyeom all those years ago when he thought the band was breaking up. 

He knew they were tears of relief. 

“Jesus, we’ve got two babies now,” Jackson said lightly and Bambam turned back to look at Jackson, sticking his tongue out at him.

"No! I'm the baby!" Bamban said cutely and Yugyeom pouted, complaining about being the actual baby.

Jackson couldn't help the smile that came over his face as he was reminded of that first childish argument between the two that gave him his Prince in the first place.


End file.
